Depression Support Group

Depression is a real and debilitating condition that is often misunderstood by family and friends. Its meaning can range from a prolonged period of sadness to an actual mental illness with specific symptoms. Find and share experiences with others who are going through the same struggles.

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Hit the floor...

deleted_user
deleted_user
I feel worse than I probably have in over a year. I just don't know who I am anymore. I look in the mirror and I see someone else. A shell, a visage, the great actor, the man in the mirror. Nobody even knows me anymore, as I hide how I really feel. I don't want to do anything anymore, I'm tired all the time (I sleep around 11-12 hours per day recently), and above all, I'm in love with someone who will never, ever have feelings for me, mostly because of my mental problems. I haven't been on a date in two years now, because I can never seem to come across as attractive to women, despite my intellect, relative purity, and musical talents. I feel as if I'm going through hell every day. I don't even want to wake up most days anymore. Nothing, not even music brings me relief anymore. The medicines only guise the sickness, and sometimes I feel like someone's missed the diagnosis here. If I were really depressed, SSRI meds should work, right? I've grown to hate myself as of late, because I can't even stir up the strength to talk to anyone about this. I already see how much people hate me in the first place, and if they knew the extent of my madness, they'd hate me even more. I only have a few good friends, and I freak out when I'm alone. I just don't know what's happening to me. Anyone else felt like this before? What's wrong with me, what am I missing? Will I always be like this? I know that's a ton of questions, but I'm on my last limb and I really don't want to be judged so I'd rather get some anonymous advice. I've been judged and hated and avoided enough.
deleted_user
deleted_user
do you know what is triggering this? have you seen a dr lately? do you talk to your friends about these feelings? you are not alone....and we will try to help if we can.
deleted_user
deleted_user
You are not alone. By far you are not the only person who has ever felt like this. Alot of the opinions you have of yourself is the depression talking. This is not how others see you at all. Depression has a way of warping how we think and feel and see ourselves. My suggestion would be to keep seeking the med out there that WILL work for you. Find a new doc and get an evaluation done to see if the dx is wrong. Tell him that this is not a life you are living. Keep going until you feel better and are confident with the dx.
deleted_user
deleted_user
Being alone is the trigger. I almost believe my act when I'm in public and I forget about things for a while, but as soon as I'm alone again I start thinking about my first ex, and how I was such a worthless twit for ever falling for her lies, and then on to my new love interest, who I have no chance with because she's out of my league. I'm a very emotional person and it's hard to not have someone who loves me out there. That's why none of the meds ever worked, because no drug can change the fact that I'm alone, and none ever will, unless they make a hallucinogen that will trick me into something.
deleted_user
deleted_user
I know exactly what you mean. I do not judge, hate,, or avoid you. Keep on talking.
deleted_user
deleted_user
A RESOUNDING YES! I haven't exspearienced the I think that everyone hates me part but much of the other. Worse year for me yet too. I don't think that you've been misdiognosed. Sounds much like depression to me! Maybe you just need to change your script {med.} Sometimes certain ones don't work for certain people. Unfortunatly somtimes they don't work at all.
deleted_user
deleted_user
Are you sure your love interest is out of your league? Have you talked to her? If she does reject you because of your emotional problems, you deserve MUCH better. There are so many people who are understanding, compassionate and not full of lies!
I was at the same place you were...going to bed at 4 am then sleeping all day, never felt like doing anything, etc. You have to push yourself sometimes, remind yourself that you're life is passing by. It's hard, but sometimes forcing yourself to go out, and be near friends can be so beneficial. You might have to pretend you're having fun for a while, but that can be contagious! It might just catch on.
If you ever need to talk, I'm here!
Love,
Mahadra
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