Wel,, I have been feeling good for a few years now. Sure, I have days where I'm in a slump but that's normal for everyone, not just depression. I will stay on my meds permanently (if i had diabetes i would be on insulin daily - depression is no different). Good 2c u have lots of plans. Don't need to fulfill them yet, give it time. Hugz. xx

lmao I fell over the crowd of people running to answer this...I am the first?All my life I been up and down,never always down,that's a good thing,no permanent cure I know of,but am getting it under control : ) xx

I can see an end to my depression. Mine has a specific cause which I could end at almost any time. Problem is my damn prode wont let me.

Yes, I think you have the answers in your own post, though I certainly am not always motivated to practice what I preach. Staying busy helps alot. It's the lying in bed, staring at the ceiling, "making friends with shadows on the wall" (to quote matchbox 20) that will do you in...

I've been good for years too. I'm on celexa and its been great. At this point I'm on a theraputic dose. If ever I need to go up in dose, my dr allows me to control that. Sure I have bad bouts at times but it usually is triggered by something. I have to think myself thru it and tell myself that its the depression talking. This way I never allow myself to sink into a deep dark hole. I feel educated with the desease aswell. If I get really bad I know I'll have to reach out.

I can tell you I have felt better in the past two years as opposed to the 5 years prior to that. I am not cured and I have not found peace but I am in a better place and I do not use medication. There is hope. I promise.

Well, I was ok for several years, working part time. I LOVED grad school. I wasn't always happy, but I certainly didn't suffere from depression! Then my husband really started pushing me to get a full time job. I went downhill fast! Got a job, started going to the gym. You can imagine, between work and exercise I was t rock bottom!!!!!

I quit my job, felt better. Came back, got worse. Started working less, felt better. Now I'm really getting stressed, but I am NOWHERE NEAR how bad I was a year ago.

You need to find what's making you sick and get it out of your life!!!

Work and the gym sucked the life out of me!! I never thought I would ever care about anything again!

It took a few weeks to feel better after I got the bad things out of my life. But I did. And I know I will again when this semester is over and I NEVER teach anymore stressful classes again. Ever.

no wish i could lie

im always on a up & down roller coaster. Could be the damn MENopaus now tho. Maybe someday ill be "OK"

I think I'll always be leaning about myself and how to cope with my illness, but I have managed to stablise enough to have built a successful business career and then dump it to help others who suffer more than I do!!
I'm proud of being able to do that despite the shit that has been thrown in my way!
Don't give up, take baby steps and there is no reason why you can't do what you wanna do! x

sorry i have just given up my life will never be happy

Absolutely,there is hope, but you MUST get on to medication. Is there any way you can get help with this?

I've been happy for about 8 years now but I couldn't have got there without first being on prozac for many years.

You have a long battle ahead of you with your living circumstances and all and you will need all the help you get - ASK FOR IT there is no shame in this.

Once your mind is cleared and you are able to function mentally, then you can gather the strength you will need to change your life for the better.

Medication first and foremost - good luck!

I really appreciate all the input. I guess the reality is, we just do what we need to do, and hope for the best. Some folks kick it, some folks manage it, and we all must always be aware of where our minds are heading. I guess I am struggling particularly, because the sort of depression I have entered into is existential...WAY out loopy thoughts on the unknowable that leave my heart pounding, my brain in knots. I feel like I am watching time tick away and everything turn to dust...Somehow I worry that I won't be able to put those worms back in the can.

I have a friend who,like you,was in a terrible depression(hers,with ups and downs,lasted about 15 years.)Also like you,she wasn't on medication.She was certain her depression was related to her "soul" and "pathos" and experience,and had absolutely nothing to do with a chemical imbalance in the brain.However, once she realized that,if she didn't like medication,she could easily go off, she tried it,and I have to say,I'm almost envious of the incredible change in her:she has a job for the first time in her life, has adopted a child,has finally finished writing her novel, and,in general, just feels like her "pre-depression" self again.(If not even better,since now she knows the awful contrast of depression.)
Medication does not work for everyone,but it does work for the vast majority,and if you haven't tried a few meds out, you are throwing away a potential salvation for yourself,and your freedom to fulfill your goals.I would hate to think this was happening to you,and I truly recommend that you look into a psychiatrist antidepressants.With meds, the abating of your pain might well be no more than 3-4 weeks away.