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friend cheating

deleted_user
deleted_user
i've gotten close to my boyfriend's brother and now he's like a brother to me too. the hard thing for me is i know he's cheating on his girlfriend. she's a nice girl and i don't want her hurt. the worst part is, i know exactly what she's going through. except she doesn't know. they say she's the type that gets upset about the little things, so something like her finding out about this would be like an a-bomb. plus, they have a house and two little kids. i don't want their kids growing up with separated parents. i want to tell her, but in some ways it might be better for her not to know. what's the right thing to do?
deleted_user
deleted_user
I don't know what you should do, but the last time I told someone they were being cheated on, it was a terrible time for me, and both people ended up hating me.
deleted_user
deleted_user
i wouldn't say anything unless i had concrete evidence. if you don't have evidence to prove it, she probably won't believe you. and she might get mad at you. and she will probably tell him and even if she doesn't hate you, he will. i think you're better off not telling her. what you might do is strategically point her in the direction of the evidence. she probably won't see it though cuz she may not want to know.
deleted_user
deleted_user
It's a difficult predicament...to tell or not to tell. And the biggest thing is evidence to support the alleged cheating (I say alleged because unless you have concrete evidence and witnessed the indiscretion then all you realistically have is a suspicion)

There's probably more cons than pros to telling her what's going on.

If you do tell her and it turns out he wasn't cheating then you run the risk of 3 people hating you for causing problems within 2 families and a 2 relationships.

If you do tell and it turns out that you were right then you still run the risk of these 3 people hating you for meddling and more than one relationship may end because of it.

Realistically, even though you are in a relationship with the guys brother, their relationship is non of your business, just as your relationship is no-one else business either. In all cases you are "the bringer of bad news" and it's not normally a favorable position.

If you REALLY feel that you need to talk to someone about it, it might be better if you talk to your BF about it first. But like I said....concrete evidence to support you claim is the clincher in all of this. Make sure that whatever you may have witnessed wasn't something innocent first.
deleted_user
deleted_user
i didn't 'witness' anything but he admits to what he's doing. thanks for all the advice everyone
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