you are not invisible at all!

sometimes I still feel that way, but not as often anymore

I wonder if how you perceive yourself is contributing to your feelings?

This is an interesting point. I think feeling invisible can be a symptom of depression. I feel that way too but can't quite figure out why. I think it's part of the sadness & discontent with our lives that some of us feel.

THe only time in my life I have been visible is since I have been here on DS....otherwise, I have felt much the same way...remember, it is a feeling, not necessarily a fact.

If you are emotionally detatched, people may (and probably do) care for you and love you, you just may not be able to feel it.

Many of us feel invisible at times. Myself included. It makes me feel alone, and that sucks. This place helps me to not feel so alone, I hope we do the same for you.

As an ex addict I know how you feel. I used from age 14 through 20 when I nearly died from an overdose.

In order to free myself from my addiction I had to move away from all my 'friends' and change my life completely - almost change my identity.

It is the hardest thing. It took years before I began to feel even remotely 'normal' (whatever that is) Actually I couldn't even string a sentence together for the first year - kept forgetting what the conversation was all about. Funny now but not at the time.

20 something years on and my past still sometimes haunts me; couldn't watch Trainspotting without feeling really sick!

However now I realise it is all part of who I am and I like the person I have become. This sort of experience is really useful for helping the younger generation stay clear of this hell.

My congratulations to you for being clean for 8 years, keep up the fight and gradually you will start to find real friends who care about you.

Stay true to yourself, kind and compassionate and don't take any crap from those who will try to bring you down
:-)

Hope this helps
Cheers
Snork

(((HUGS)))), I see you my friend! You have to take the steps to help you feel better. It's all in you! xx

First off,congratulations on getting and staying sober!8 years...that is awesome.A very dear friend of mine died 6 years ago of a heroin overdose;he had been an addict for half his life and I somehow thought he was invincible...until heroin.That is such a cruel,addictive drug.Overcoming it as you have reveals a true strength of character that is truly admirable,and nothing to feel self doubt,shame, or anything negative about. Very few people overcome such huge obstacles.
Why do you not feel much better?Well, it is possible to cure the habit but not the disease,and not the pain that partly brought that disease on.How different is your life now than when you began using?What sorts of changes have you made to feel more recognized, cared about, able to communicate,part of and not hidden from the world?If you are depressed,it is likely you have found it very hard to make such changes,if not impossible.If you have been living in so much "silence"such a long time,I would definitely recommend a pyschiatrist.It is possible that antidepressants might be able to cure an underlying imbalance,thus lightening your depression,and it would also be rewarding for you to have someone to talk to,who will be able to help you make necessary changes in your life. I have seen many psychiatrists,and know how hard it is to find a good one, you may have,too, but it is really so important to persist here,because someone to communicate with is so essential when we feel isolated and abandoned and alone.
You ARE visible--distinctive actually--and your post moved me a great deal.If you'd ever like to contact me,please do. And remember,part of depression is self distortion, so you are actually much more visible(just isolating,it seems like)than you feel.Best wishes to you!

Congrats on kicking the habit, n keeping off them. You are not invisible and you have a great part in this world. Please just see it is part of the dep. illness and Most of us have gone through this. It will pass and then we will be able to see the true you. Til then chin up n keep up the good work .XXX

In my experience as a former addict, I tend to feel how I think society views me, or how I deserved to feel. I was guilty for the things I had done while on drugs, and wore it so others would shame me the same. They did; it took a while for even family members to see me as a person, for my accomplishments, rather than as "the junkie". It takes a long list of good deeds to ditch the reputation as an addict; the more good you do, the more you will be noticed for the positive. Most of all, don't let people forget you or see through you. Be kind, give them a reason to give you the attention you deserve. You are here; I see you; you are a beautiful person in a lifelong struggle. I hope that many others see you the way we do.
Lots of love,
Mahadra

this is to the TEN replies that I got today. I am struggling to type because I am crying. Total strangers caring instead of hateing. I cant believe it. I am not used to this. I'm sorry that I do'nt have time right now to write back to all but let me say, I'm almost 50 yrs. old I have hurt hundreds of people mainly through lying and taking their money. I did not want to but, I did. Now, today, I am reading kind and loving words by angels that dont know or deserve. I cant stop crying and I feel like throwing-up. I am used to hatred and judgement, not this. Thank you all so much for this gift. Christmas has truly come early for me...

maybe the people that don't want to look at us ,the ivisible,is because they are afraid they will see a reflectionthemselves..hang in we all have good and bad in us