damn my moms death anniversary is tomorrow and i don't wanna be around anybody because i don't wanna verbally or physically go off on anybody but no i see my therapist tomorrow and god damn it my uncle asked one of my friends and her girlfriend to come over tomorrow god doesn't anyone understand the concept of being alone........fuuuuuuuuuuuck...i just wish i could have my mom back.......totally wanna kill myself so i don't have to deal with this....god damn it ugggggggh i hope i am all calm tomorrow and i do not see how i will get sleep tonight or tomorrow night......fuck it all...damn it...just wish my girlfriend wasn't so far away so she could hold me tomorrow hell that is the only person i'd wanna be around other than my dad andhe is a bit too far from me just like my g/f except he is further...fuck doesn't anything ever go the way i want it?....ugh....god i feel like crying right now but i ain't wich is even more fucked up god knows i'll probably either have another surreal moment all day tomorrow or i'll be crying most of the day and i hope it is a surreal moment so i do not have to deal with the whole fucking day of my mom's fuckin death...fuuuuuck
Posts You May Be Interested In
A friend sent this to me..As far as I can see, grief will never truly end.It may become softer overtime, more gentleand some days will feel sharp.But grief will last as long as Love does - ForeverIt's simply the way the absence of your loved onemanifests in your heart. A deep longing accompaniedby the deepest Love some days. The heavy fog mayreturn and the next day, it may recede.Once again, it's...
Today is my 25th birthday, to my somewhat lack of surprise I can see already no one really seems to care. I've always been the kinda person to make sure that everyone I Care about feels appreciated and knew somebody had their back. I can count 4 times this year when I Went out of my way to make sure a "friend" felt good on their birthday, especially if they got left hanging. Its early in the...