it seems like everytime i finally get the courage to leave my safety zone,(my apartment) i end up being faced with a situation that anyone normal would just shrug off, but i am crippled by it. i had a nervous breakdown over a black stand at the goodwill, earlier today, because the manager was being a dick or whatever, even th security gaurd knew it, but you know he couldn\'t say anything cause it was his job, and i ran away in tears, over a tv stand? and here i am thinking that i could actually hold down a job wortking in the public, and it is so obvious that i have absolutely no control over my emotions, and people just do not care or understand. the whole thing started because this woman wanted to put her two cents in, and as i was fleeing she was like, \"what happened, your not gonna get anyrthing?\" and i was balling at this point and i couldn\'t even get the words out to say how sick i was of people behaving that way, and i wanted to tell her, how fucking long it took me to get the courage to leave my house, to be treated thiws way, god only knows h0ow long it will be before i try again and does she feel the least bit of guilt? fuck no, she could care less. and that fucks me up, sorry for cussing, but seriously, why are people so cruel, you have to know somthing is up when someone gets upset over something silly, is there np compassion? My new years day got screwed. but then again, what did i really expect?
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