i want to know.. will i ever get out of this.. i am so freaking tired of being ok for a day.. or an hour.. and then suddenly its like im dropped straight back into this pain.. i havent left my house in i cant remember..2 months maybe.. my life revolves around drugs and getting away from myself.. i have 0 real friends apart from those who share a similar drug interest..iam ALONE.. i feel repulsive.. i cant even describe the pain.. its never ending.. i know so many people feel like this too.. but whats the point to it all? 4years later im so much worse than when i was diagnosed..i cant take another 6months of this painful insane BORING hell i call my life.. and i said that 4 years ago.. now i REALLY mean i CANT.. all i do is sit at home so alone and let myself rot.. will this ever go away? will i ever get to a point where i am glad i held on and didnt give up on life?.. i doubt it very much.. why do i keep going? why do you keep going?
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