ok i is letting this out, think of me as you will. i do not know what to do for the best. i have six wonderful beautiful children that i love with all my heart, but i am dragging them down, i do not want to hurt them the way i am at the moment. and i can see it in their eyes the pain.if i stay around the pain may get worse. if i go they have safe and happy places to go were they are safe and happy before they get to old. and there are still happy memories to hold on to. i have asked for help and the only answer i get is stay for the children but by staying i know i am hurting them and that is making me feel worse is i a bad mum for feeling this way YEAH i ******* am.
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