I have gone thru a divorce and cant seem to feel any self worth and with all that I have let my addiction ease back into my life. I have been caught and stopped and I realize that its not quitting that is hard its the derpession that I live with daily that somehow in my mind lets me think its ok to do drugs on a smaller scale than I once was but at any rate still can be harmful in many ways.Am I figting a lost cause because I dont seem to be able to forget the fellings of "not good enuf" and "youll never be worth anything to anyone" feelings that I have lived with for at least the past 20 years??? Does one outweight the other meaning do I fight the addiction 1st or the depression?? Or without the derpession will there be a need for the addiction?? and if so How do I fight the depression??? I feel lost and trapped and see no end to the misery.. I will say my worst addiction is my ex.. I cant seem to get on with my life and let his controll over me go. We have 2 kids and it makes it hard to have no contact and I cant seem to find "MYSELF" what ever that means...
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