I'm sorry to do this guys, but I tried to bring up a subject that I needed help with and I did get alot of help (motivation) but I lied...what's really going on with me today is that I just can't seem to stop crying. I don't mean that I'm crying non=stop, but I just crying and scream,etc and then calm down for alittle while and start again. I'm so lonely and deprived of human touch that I'm dying inside...I still love my ex so much that it literally hurts. He doesn't want me and he's made that very very clear. Why? cause, I'm a slob and I "use my mental illness" as an excuse...he wants to remain "friends" and he's the only person taht I have to talk to (except you guys)...I don't even know why I still love him...he's such an asshole and he makes me so mad whenever we talk now and I know that I "deserve" better (yea,right) but I can't stop...I just want it to be like it was.....us, together....god, has turned his back to me...no love for me every again and I can't get the suicide thing down...my meds aren't working, I've just lost my insurance, etc. We all have bad things going on, but I just don't want to live like this anymore...I cry,and cry....I wake up crying....help me please
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