Depression Support Group
Depression is a real and debilitating condition that is often misunderstood by family and friends. Its meaning can range from a prolonged period of sadness to an actual mental illness with specific symptoms. Find and share experiences with others who are going through the same struggles.
Okay...so I have been trying for about 3 weeks to get out of this dark place...my friend just sent me this email...at least I lauhged...I would like to share it with all of you, too...maybe you will all laugh too!
Attending a wedding for the first time, a little
girl whispered to her mother, "Why is the bride
dressed in white?"
"Because white is the color of happiness, and
today is the happiest day of her life." The child
thought about this for a moment, then said, "So why
is the groom wearing black?"
-------------------------------------------------------------------------
A little girl, dressed in her Sunday best, was running
as fast as she could, trying not to be late for Bible class.
As she ran she prayed,
"Dear Lord, please don't let me be late! Dear Lord,
please don't let me be late!" While she was running and
praying, she tripped on a curb and fell, getting her clothes
dirty and tearing her dress.
She got up, brushed herself off,
and started running again! in. As she ran she once again
began to pray, "Dear Lord, please don't let me be late... But
please don't shove me either!"
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Three boys are in the school yard bragging about their fathers.
The first boy says, "My Dad scribbles a few words on a piece
of paper, he calls it a poem, they give him $50.
The second boy says, "That's nothing. My Dad scribbles a few words on a piece of paper, he calls it a song, they give him $100."
The third boy says, "I got you both beat. My Dad scribbles a few
words on a piece of paper, he calls it a sermon, and it takes
eight people to collect all the money!"
~~~~~~~~~~~~
An elderly woman died last month. Having never married, she
requested no male pallbearers. In her handwritten instructions
for her memorial service, she wrote, "They wouldn't take me out
while I was alive, I don't want them to take me out when I'm dead."
~~~~~~~~~~~~
A Sunday School teacher asked her class why Joseph and Mary took
Jesus with them to Jerusalem . A small child replied:
"They couldn't get a baby sitter."
~~~~~~~~~~~~
A Sunday school teacher was discussing the Ten Commandments
with her five and six year olds. After explaining the commandment
to "honor thy father and thy mother," she asked "Is there a
commandment that teaches us how to treat our brothers and sisters?"
Without missing a beat one little boy answered, "Thou shall not kill."
~~~~~~~~~~~~
At Sunday School they were teaching how God created
everything, including human beings. Little Johnny seemed
especially intent when they told him how Eve was created
out of one of Adam's ribs.
Later in the week his mother noticed him lying down as though he were ill, and she said,"Johnny, what is the matter?" Little Johnny responded, "I
have pain in my side. I think I'm going to have a wife"
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Two boys were walking home from Sunday school after
hearing a strong preaching on the devil. One said to the
other, "What do you think about all this Satan stuff?"
The other boy replied, "Well, you know how Santa
Claus turned out. It's probably just your Dad.
~~~~~~~~~~
You don't stop laughing because you grow old, you
grow old because you stop laughing!
Take heed and pass these along to people who need a
laugh.
Attending a wedding for the first time, a little
girl whispered to her mother, "Why is the bride
dressed in white?"
"Because white is the color of happiness, and
today is the happiest day of her life." The child
thought about this for a moment, then said, "So why
is the groom wearing black?"
-------------------------------------------------------------------------
A little girl, dressed in her Sunday best, was running
as fast as she could, trying not to be late for Bible class.
As she ran she prayed,
"Dear Lord, please don't let me be late! Dear Lord,
please don't let me be late!" While she was running and
praying, she tripped on a curb and fell, getting her clothes
dirty and tearing her dress.
She got up, brushed herself off,
and started running again! in. As she ran she once again
began to pray, "Dear Lord, please don't let me be late... But
please don't shove me either!"
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Three boys are in the school yard bragging about their fathers.
The first boy says, "My Dad scribbles a few words on a piece
of paper, he calls it a poem, they give him $50.
The second boy says, "That's nothing. My Dad scribbles a few words on a piece of paper, he calls it a song, they give him $100."
The third boy says, "I got you both beat. My Dad scribbles a few
words on a piece of paper, he calls it a sermon, and it takes
eight people to collect all the money!"
~~~~~~~~~~~~
An elderly woman died last month. Having never married, she
requested no male pallbearers. In her handwritten instructions
for her memorial service, she wrote, "They wouldn't take me out
while I was alive, I don't want them to take me out when I'm dead."
~~~~~~~~~~~~
A Sunday School teacher asked her class why Joseph and Mary took
Jesus with them to Jerusalem . A small child replied:
"They couldn't get a baby sitter."
~~~~~~~~~~~~
A Sunday school teacher was discussing the Ten Commandments
with her five and six year olds. After explaining the commandment
to "honor thy father and thy mother," she asked "Is there a
commandment that teaches us how to treat our brothers and sisters?"
Without missing a beat one little boy answered, "Thou shall not kill."
~~~~~~~~~~~~
At Sunday School they were teaching how God created
everything, including human beings. Little Johnny seemed
especially intent when they told him how Eve was created
out of one of Adam's ribs.
Later in the week his mother noticed him lying down as though he were ill, and she said,"Johnny, what is the matter?" Little Johnny responded, "I
have pain in my side. I think I'm going to have a wife"
~~~~~~~~~~~~
Two boys were walking home from Sunday school after
hearing a strong preaching on the devil. One said to the
other, "What do you think about all this Satan stuff?"
The other boy replied, "Well, you know how Santa
Claus turned out. It's probably just your Dad.
~~~~~~~~~~
You don't stop laughing because you grow old, you
grow old because you stop laughing!
Take heed and pass these along to people who need a
laugh.
deleted_user
thanks for the smiles x
sja
Loved them. I am sending them to my mom. She loved the spider story, by the way, and said she has been there herself.
deleted_user
That was funny--thanks for the share. Made me laugh.
deleted_user
that wa good
Magdalena8
Cute, I posted them to my friends. Thanks
deleted_user
Oh, those were so funny! Thanks for posting them. I needed a laugh!
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theatre and I are there already. I'm having a very berry tea with crackers, cheese and cherry tomatoes and she's having a joint with some beer and we're both on really comfy recliners on thick pile carpet. we need some help with the decor if anyone is around??
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I'm trying to exercise daily. I was doing fairly well until I sprained my ankle 2 weeks ago but now I'm getting back on the horse. Today I walked over a mile with my arm weights that are about 22lbs total. I was out of shape and it was hard on my arms. I also did my 30 situps. I'm also going to drink a lot of water and try to eat healthy. I do tend to have a sweet tooth but I'm cutting...
