Depression Support Group
Depression is a real and debilitating condition that is often misunderstood by family and friends. Its meaning can range from a prolonged period of sadness to an actual mental illness with specific symptoms. Find and share experiences with others who are going through the same struggles.
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FROM: Pauline Lewis, Human Resources Director
TO: All Employees
DATE: 4th November
RE: Christmas Party
I'm happy to inform you that the company Christmas Party will take
place on December 23rd, starting at noon in the private function
room at the Grill House. There will be a cash bar and plenty of
drinks! We'll have a small band playing traditional carols...please
feel free to sing along. And don't be surprised if the Managing
Director shows up dressed as Santa Claus! A Christmas tree will be
lit at 1.00 p.m.
Exchange of gifts among employees can be done at that time; however,
no gift should be over $10.00 to make the giving of gifts easy for
everyone's pockets.
This gathering is only for employees! The Managing Director will make
a special announcement at the Party. Merry Christmas to you and your
Family.
Pauline
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
FROM: Pauline Lewis, Human Resources Director
TO: All Employees
DATE: 5th November
RE: Holiday Party
In no way was yesterday's memo intended to exclude our Jewish
employees. We recognize that Chanukah is an important holiday, which
often coincides with Christmas, though unfortunately not this year.
However, from now on we're calling it our 'Holiday Party.' The same
policy applies to any other employees who are not Christians. There
will be no Christmas tree or Christmas carols sung. We will have
other types of music for your enjoyment. Happy now?
Happy Holidays to you and your family,
Pauline.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
FROM; Pauline Lewis, Human Resources Director
TO: All Employees
DATE: 6th November
RE: Holiday Party
Regarding the note I received from a member of Alcoholics Anonymous
requesting a non-drinking table...you didn't sign your name. I'm
happy to accommodate this request, but if I put a sign on a table
that reads, 'AA Only,' you wouldn't be anonymous anymore!!!! How am
I supposed to handle this? Somebody?
Forget about the gift exchange. No gift exchange will be allowed
now, since the Union Officials feel that $10.00 is too much money
and Management believes $10.00 is a little too cheap. I repeat,
NO GIFT EXCHANGE WILL BE ALLOWED.
Pauline.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
FROM: Pauline Lewis, Human Resources Director
TO: All Employees
DATE: 7th November
RE: Holiday Party
My, my! What a diverse group we are! I had no idea that December
20th begins the Muslim holy month of Ramadan, which forbids eating
and drinking during daylight hours. There goes the party! Seriously,
we can appreciate how a luncheon at this time of year does not
accommodate our Muslim employees' beliefs, so perhaps the Grill
House can hold off on serving your meal until the end of the party -
or else package everything up for you to take home in a little foil
doggy bag. Will that work?
Meanwhile, I've arranged for members of Weight Watchers to sit
farthest from the dessert buffet and pregnant women will get the
table closest to the toilets, gays are allowed to sit with each
other, lesbians do not have to sit with gay men, each group will
have their own table.
Yes, there will be flower arrangements for the gay men's table, too.
To the person asking permission to cross dress - no cross dressing
allowed. And NO blow-up sheep, either.
We will have booster seats for short people. Low fat food will be
available for those on a diet. We cannot control the salt used in the
food. We suggest those people with high blood pressure taste the food
first. There will be fresh fruits as dessert for Diabetics, as the
restaurant cannot supply 'No Sugar' desserts. Sorry!
Did I miss anything?!?!?!?!?!
Pauline.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
FROM: Pauline Lewis, Human Resources Director
TO: All F***g Employees
DATE: 8 November
RE: The F***g Holiday Party.
Vegetarian pricks...I've had it with you people!!! We're going to
keep this party at the Grill House whether you like it or not, so
you can sit quietly at the table furthest from the 'grill of death',
as you so quaintly put it. You'll get your f****g salad bar,
including tofu and organic tomatoes. But you know...tomatoes have
feelings, too. They scream when you slice them. I've heard them
scream. I'm hearing them scream right NOW!!
Hope you all have a sh**y holiday.
The Bitch from HELL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
FROM: John Bishop - Acting Human Resources Director
DATE: 9th November
RE: Pauline Lewis and Holiday Party
I'm sure I speak for all of us in wishing Pauline Lewis a speedy
recovery, and I'll continue to forward your cards to her.
In the meantime, Management has decided to cancel our Holiday Party
and instead, give everyone the afternoon of 23rd December off with
full pay.
FROM: Pauline Lewis, Human Resources Director
TO: All Employees
DATE: 4th November
RE: Christmas Party
I'm happy to inform you that the company Christmas Party will take
place on December 23rd, starting at noon in the private function
room at the Grill House. There will be a cash bar and plenty of
drinks! We'll have a small band playing traditional carols...please
feel free to sing along. And don't be surprised if the Managing
Director shows up dressed as Santa Claus! A Christmas tree will be
lit at 1.00 p.m.
Exchange of gifts among employees can be done at that time; however,
no gift should be over $10.00 to make the giving of gifts easy for
everyone's pockets.
This gathering is only for employees! The Managing Director will make
a special announcement at the Party. Merry Christmas to you and your
Family.
Pauline
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
FROM: Pauline Lewis, Human Resources Director
TO: All Employees
DATE: 5th November
RE: Holiday Party
In no way was yesterday's memo intended to exclude our Jewish
employees. We recognize that Chanukah is an important holiday, which
often coincides with Christmas, though unfortunately not this year.
However, from now on we're calling it our 'Holiday Party.' The same
policy applies to any other employees who are not Christians. There
will be no Christmas tree or Christmas carols sung. We will have
other types of music for your enjoyment. Happy now?
Happy Holidays to you and your family,
Pauline.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
FROM; Pauline Lewis, Human Resources Director
TO: All Employees
DATE: 6th November
RE: Holiday Party
Regarding the note I received from a member of Alcoholics Anonymous
requesting a non-drinking table...you didn't sign your name. I'm
happy to accommodate this request, but if I put a sign on a table
that reads, 'AA Only,' you wouldn't be anonymous anymore!!!! How am
I supposed to handle this? Somebody?
Forget about the gift exchange. No gift exchange will be allowed
now, since the Union Officials feel that $10.00 is too much money
and Management believes $10.00 is a little too cheap. I repeat,
NO GIFT EXCHANGE WILL BE ALLOWED.
Pauline.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
FROM: Pauline Lewis, Human Resources Director
TO: All Employees
DATE: 7th November
RE: Holiday Party
My, my! What a diverse group we are! I had no idea that December
20th begins the Muslim holy month of Ramadan, which forbids eating
and drinking during daylight hours. There goes the party! Seriously,
we can appreciate how a luncheon at this time of year does not
accommodate our Muslim employees' beliefs, so perhaps the Grill
House can hold off on serving your meal until the end of the party -
or else package everything up for you to take home in a little foil
doggy bag. Will that work?
Meanwhile, I've arranged for members of Weight Watchers to sit
farthest from the dessert buffet and pregnant women will get the
table closest to the toilets, gays are allowed to sit with each
other, lesbians do not have to sit with gay men, each group will
have their own table.
Yes, there will be flower arrangements for the gay men's table, too.
To the person asking permission to cross dress - no cross dressing
allowed. And NO blow-up sheep, either.
We will have booster seats for short people. Low fat food will be
available for those on a diet. We cannot control the salt used in the
food. We suggest those people with high blood pressure taste the food
first. There will be fresh fruits as dessert for Diabetics, as the
restaurant cannot supply 'No Sugar' desserts. Sorry!
Did I miss anything?!?!?!?!?!
Pauline.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
FROM: Pauline Lewis, Human Resources Director
TO: All F***g Employees
DATE: 8 November
RE: The F***g Holiday Party.
Vegetarian pricks...I've had it with you people!!! We're going to
keep this party at the Grill House whether you like it or not, so
you can sit quietly at the table furthest from the 'grill of death',
as you so quaintly put it. You'll get your f****g salad bar,
including tofu and organic tomatoes. But you know...tomatoes have
feelings, too. They scream when you slice them. I've heard them
scream. I'm hearing them scream right NOW!!
Hope you all have a sh**y holiday.
The Bitch from HELL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
FROM: John Bishop - Acting Human Resources Director
DATE: 9th November
RE: Pauline Lewis and Holiday Party
I'm sure I speak for all of us in wishing Pauline Lewis a speedy
recovery, and I'll continue to forward your cards to her.
In the meantime, Management has decided to cancel our Holiday Party
and instead, give everyone the afternoon of 23rd December off with
full pay.
deleted_user
lmao this is really good
deleted_user
lol ... okay poz we have the same sense of humour .... I posted the same joke yesterday ... lol
deleted_user
oh that is good lol where do you get them from?
Join the Conversation
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I have been here before, a long long time ago and now I am back.Forgive me for not just saying what I want to say,even under a triple dose of antidepressants it is still raw and seeping and I am hesitant at revealing it as at least under the bandages around my heart I don,t have to look at how raw and wounded.My child was cleaved from my heart by his own actions. my child of ten,turning eleven...
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theatre and I are there already. I'm having a very berry tea with crackers, cheese and cherry tomatoes and she's having a joint with some beer and we're both on really comfy recliners on thick pile carpet. we need some help with the decor if anyone is around??
