Im just so sick of it all day? Im very angry about nothing. Its part of the bipolar but I dont belong to that group cause I like you guys and I cant bear the thought of trying to make new friends who will tell me to get my act together. My right hip is killing me. My son is still getting into everything. My kitchen is totally distroyed again after me cleaning it last night after putting the kids to bed. Im sick of always having to be the smily content face to everyone when I just want to snap and yell at them for being bone heads. Im sick of always having to be the pretty pretty princess to the whole world when for once I just want to walk around in my jammies all freakin day long with my hair going every which way. I want to go out for once and have a trust worthy babysitter. I want to feel like im 25 instead of much older then that. I want to have groceries in my house and not have to count out the money in my change jug to do so. I want my ex to pay child support for his daughter instead of always being the nice guy and making me feel guilty for bringing it up. I want my never ending pile of laundery to be clean, folded, and put away without it coming back the following night. I would like to lay in my bed with somone who loves me and rubs my back gently until I fall asleep. I want someone who loves me to make me breakfast in bed. I want a candle lit dinner for two with a nice bottle of wine. I want to drink that bottle of wine with someone instead of alone like I did last night but it not being a cheap bottle of wine like I had last night. I dont want all of this to be to much to ask.
Posts You May Be Interested In
I have been here before, a long long time ago and now I am back.Forgive me for not just saying what I want to say,even under a triple dose of antidepressants it is still raw and seeping and I am hesitant at revealing it as at least under the bandages around my heart I don,t have to look at how raw and wounded.My child was cleaved from my heart by his own actions. my child of ten,turning eleven...
I gave my 2 week notice last Friday 13th. Now to join you fine people in a life of leisure and nothing else to do but to look out for myself....is it just me or does that sound pretty boring? My goal was to live to retire and I guess having to take early retirement because of health reasons wasn't exactly the way I had planned things. I just can't stay in that building that is reeking mildew...