People who are "crazy about me" don't put me down, don't criticize me and don't over-emphasize my human qualities (flaws).

I'd rather "hurt" someone and leave then be miserable with them.

You'll be the one to decide if the relationships is worth the emotional toll.

Good point... but at the same time he always talks about how much he's in love w/ me, and couldn't be happier, and would just be devestated if we broke up, and that he's attached, and how much he misses me.. bla bla bla

sorry I don't mean to fill this thing up w/ my relationship issues... but its linked to my depression i promise!

Listen to loo, that is only of the relationship dynamics that can be played out. The other side is also the one who claims to be supportive but holds back on the hostility because supportive is how they are "supposed to be".

Relationships can exacerbate a relationship. Anyone who delights in criticizing you is giving you a message about who they are as a person.

If you ask and they don't stop, then the ball is in your court.

loo, the rescuer can also be someone who is jealous and is afraid to lose you. Keeping you down is just one way to ensure that you won't leave.

I'm glad that you did.

Now that I think of it I think he did like me better when I was depressed. I was quiet, easy going, I would do anything he wanted cuz I didn't find interest in anything, I wasn't confident and outspoken like usual, I leaned on him, I was needy and he could take care of me like he wanted to. Now that I'm up its like he is suddenly realizing who I really am. I just don't see this working out... but its going to break his heart...

court that isn't necessarily true. A lot of people are afraid to break up, leave, etc. As a result, they start doing things to get the other person to leave.

You are not responsible for his feelings or his interpretations of you and the world. He has direct control over that.

Osteoron... I know people who do that, but I know he doesn't want to break up... we have VERY good communication in our relationship... although it may sound like we don't. I told him that my feelings for him weren't as strong and that we needed to slow down and he was very understanding.... he may have just been having a bad night tonight... he did say he was crabby... but it does seem like he highlights my faults... which I already know about... but maybe I'm the same way w/ him... I should think about that.

Not the happy I want... I mean he is good to me, but I just don't feel the sparks. We dated in high school too, and now again after 4 years apart. I had the sparks then but I was a different person then.... And I'd want a relationship to make me walking on air in the beginning, you know what I mean?

No, don't mind you asking... I don't really know... I guess I had had the sparks when I had seen him for short times during those 4 years... he was about 1200 miles away and came home this summer.... his mom just kind of expected us to get back together and wanted me to come over when he came home... it was hard to tell if I really had feelings for him again because of the depression (which I told him about and tried to talk him out of staying w/ me until I felt better at least he wouldn't have it) so I was curious to see how I felt once I started feeling better.... I guess it was almost like everyone just expected us to be back together when he came home... so I was almost pushed into it.. I was his "girlfriend" before I even had a say in it

i know exactly how u feel i was recently in that situation and i just told him that it was to hard being far away...it was my excuse...and the same here i didnt want to hurt him.. but its better to hurt them now and tell them the truth instead of hurting them worse when they are really insane about u... just get it done short and snappy... it will be the easiest..

I used to think he was my soulmate... but lately it seems like he misunderstands a lot of what I say, and that we are in two separate worlds... and I think he still loves the girl I was 4 years ago.... he says I'm the same girl... but I have changed in so many ways... and he didn't know I was different when I was depressed until I told him... shouldn't someone really close to you know? My close friends could tell, my parents too. Besides... there might be other boys I want to date right?

Yeah... and if I stay w/ him when I really don't want to, I'll just start being mean to him... and thats no good either.

Thanks for the advice ya'll ;)