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I keep waffling on what to do with my son
He is ADHD, ODD, Depressed and/or bi polar (the powers that be aren't sure on that one)
He is sixteen, has survived two suicides, both his fathers and a father figure, and one person who said he would be John's mentor, then left out of the blue.....all before he was 12 years old
Last week he didn't come in until 3 am the next morning
Didn't go to school this week except today
We had a big dramatic blow out on Wednesday, I fan the fire, did not react calmly
Where he goes to school he can live there, but I don't want that to happen, but I want to do whats best for him, but don't know if that is the best thing to do, there are many hard cases there, its a county run facility, nothing private or hoity toity, I feel for the kids there, but my boy is sooooo impressionable
I know he is smoking pot
I always love him, sometimes don't like what he does, feel compassion, anger, hate myself for not being a better decision maker
any thoughts??? it comes in waves, I grieve for him, he is throwing away his years
just like I did
I want to stop him
wow, this was long.....thanks for any ideas
He is ADHD, ODD, Depressed and/or bi polar (the powers that be aren't sure on that one)
He is sixteen, has survived two suicides, both his fathers and a father figure, and one person who said he would be John's mentor, then left out of the blue.....all before he was 12 years old
Last week he didn't come in until 3 am the next morning
Didn't go to school this week except today
We had a big dramatic blow out on Wednesday, I fan the fire, did not react calmly
Where he goes to school he can live there, but I don't want that to happen, but I want to do whats best for him, but don't know if that is the best thing to do, there are many hard cases there, its a county run facility, nothing private or hoity toity, I feel for the kids there, but my boy is sooooo impressionable
I know he is smoking pot
I always love him, sometimes don't like what he does, feel compassion, anger, hate myself for not being a better decision maker
any thoughts??? it comes in waves, I grieve for him, he is throwing away his years
just like I did
I want to stop him
wow, this was long.....thanks for any ideas
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I have been here before, a long long time ago and now I am back.Forgive me for not just saying what I want to say,even under a triple dose of antidepressants it is still raw and seeping and I am hesitant at revealing it as at least under the bandages around my heart I don,t have to look at how raw and wounded.My child was cleaved from my heart by his own actions. my child of ten,turning eleven...
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Has anyone tried these supplements? Do they give MGers more quality of life by improving memory and overall well being?Thanks!Barbel
That always made me hurt more.
Personally, I never did these things because they were bad and I wanted attention, as I'm sure many people think.I did it because I was bored and not challenged at school.I've known a lot of people who are like this and smoke pot(though I've never tried it myself) and I've found that they do it simply because they don't care and aren't motivated to do the right thing and go to class and what not.They think that their futures are served for them on a platter.Maybe you should let him have a reality check without fighting with him, and since you're his mom, I think you're the only one who knows how to accomplish THAT.
good luck momma!
If he isn't ready for help or ready to acknowledge that there are problems, any prolonged efforts on your part will only drive a wedge between you that could be life long.
If he is not using meds for ADD and ADHD, he is likely getting the side benefits of pot for this as well. If he has a lot of anger, he may be using the pot to mellow himself out. It can also take an edge of depression.
The important feature is if he views pot as "an herb" and "natural" or as a drug like any other illegal substance.
If he is smoking daily, he is likely using it for anxiety and depression.
Would you offer him the opportunity to log in here? He doesn't need to know that you use the site and he might be able to get some feed back from people on seeking treatment and getting help rather than sinking deeper in drugs?
have a hug
As hard as it is (my sister did it), you may have to understand your limits and let go a bit. Particularly if you are having a hrad time keeping your cool. That does not mean the end of love, it just means a new path with limits. If (and that is a big if) he does have that many issues, he needs a more restrictive (but positive and nuturing) environment to help him sort it out and get it on track.
you definitely need to get him help ASAP.
teens, for the most part, are good at keeping they're feelings a secret. so whatever you see, times it by 50! he's hurting more than you know
we r friends, and i have been there with losing my cool, especially with my 16 yr. old daughter; we r mothers, and want what's best for our children, so it's a very sensative area when it comes to our own children; i think that u know what u have to do, in your heart, as u know, i am going something with my own 16 yr. old, as well, so I definitely know what u mean when u have good days and not so good days; it's normal; every parent has them; u have a tough decision to make, and i want u to know that i am here for u, whatever u decide to do. i think that if he is doing pot, that it would be good for him to live in the facility, maybe this will help him overcome his habit; i did it when i was younger, so i know what u mean by "just like i did"