I have heard that for the millionth time and I'm sick of it..."it'll get better someday" I hate that because it wont. Why can't I just be happy? Why is it so difficult? I want help, need help, know it, and still there's nothing I can do and it just hurts. All I want is just a shred of happiness, a day of no worry, no anxiety....anything. I just can't find any reason to keep fighting....it hurts to much to carry on with the worry and stress and anxiety and sleepless nights and freaking out...never any peace. I have been physically sick for the past 4 days....I am miserable and I just don't know what to do....I can't hold up much longer...I'm about to fold under this stress. There's not enough weed in the world to fix me now...it used to help a lot, but now it doesn't do anything for me, and it's a habit that I can't quit...so so so tired of life....I just want one little break. Is that too much to ask for?
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I have been here before, a long long time ago and now I am back.Forgive me for not just saying what I want to say,even under a triple dose of antidepressants it is still raw and seeping and I am hesitant at revealing it as at least under the bandages around my heart I don,t have to look at how raw and wounded.My child was cleaved from my heart by his own actions. my child of ten,turning eleven...
theatre and I are there already. I'm having a very berry tea with crackers, cheese and cherry tomatoes and she's having a joint with some beer and we're both on really comfy recliners on thick pile carpet. we need some help with the decor if anyone is around??