I am so, so angry and hurt. Long story short, I’ve had an eating disorder (anorexia-now binge eating) for a long time and struggled with anxiety for a long time and now depression. I’ve been to multiple doctors, counselors, tried multiple medications - ultimately what I’ve come to learn is this: seeking help is great - but it only works if you also help yourself. I am SO fed up with going to strangers (this may seem counterintuitive bc I’m taking to strangers rn, but it’s different for me!) and telling them VERY personal information, letting them get my hopes up, prescribe a medication that only makes me more depressed, talk to me about everything that went wrong in my childhood, and leave me to ponder that for 3 weeks or so while I suffer until we do it all over again. Less than a month ago, I told my parents I was done with counseling/medication. I want to help myself. Trying to heal from things like an eating disorder or depression don’t happen overnight, right?! So, I’ve slipped up since then but still had motivation to get better. Little did I know, my parents scheduled an appointment for a doctor who counsels AND prescribes medicine for tomorrow morning. They told me this on Sunday - I cried and literally BEGGED them for hours, not to go. I gave them every reason and I pleaded with them to listen to me. They always reply with “we are - we’re doing this bc we love you.” Which I HATE. In my opinion, if you love someone, you listen to them. We ended the discussion in a way that I thought I wouldn’t have to go to the appointment. I was wrong. They bring it up again and I can’t help but start sobbing/begging again. After a while of back and forth, my dad goes, “you’re going to kill yourself if you keep living like this.” And my blood went cold, I told them to get out and I didn’t want to talk to them anymore tonight. I am so hurt that my own father would say something like that to my face out of “love” or not. And the worse thing is, both of my parents always play the “it’s bc we love you” or CRYING card way too much and I give in every single time even though they’ve hurt me so badly. I feel betrayed by both of them, I feel more UNloved than loved, I feel like my voice never matters. Now I’m going to be up all night worrying about this appointment and my sleep “schedule” is already terrible. I have to go on a 3 week trip with them this summer, just me and them, and with all my heart I don’t want to go. I feel like no one understands...I text my siblings (they’re older and are moved out) and my sister sides with my parents, my brother just shrugs it off. I only have one good friend to talk to and she’s alwahs like “it’s God’s plan, it’s God’s plan” and yes, I believe in God, but how can you tell me that my dad saying to me “you’re going to kill your self” is what God intended? I want out of this house and I just want to be heard.
it doesn’t matter how many people you surround yourself with you still feel alone. fed up of this shit now! was feeling good until i had this fibromyalgia flare up :( it’s not just the pain you have to deal with it’s all the other emotions that come with it.
Hello,My Doctor put me on Celexa for major depression a few days ago and I feel jittery and have lost my appetite. Does anyone know if the side effects like this go away? Should I continue taking it?