It's amazing how I can be feeling pretty good for days, and then I can be sitting at home or in my chair at work, and I can almost feel that loneliness, sadness, hopelessness start to slowly begin to wash over you. And I try to focus my mind on other, more positive things. And I wish I could sometimes just close the door to my office and hide in here for days. Or I wish I could just reach out to someone who battles depression as I do and just talk. How can I be feeling so good for so many days, and then this damn feeling washes over you and takes it all away. Well, it tries to take it away. I fight like heck not to let it. And as I write this, I just repeat to myself to place my trust in God and the more I repeat it, the better I feel. Faith. Just pure unwaivering Faith that God will handle it. And now as I reflect, the reason it has tried to slowly seep in to my feelings and emotions, is because I haven't focused enough on God and loving God. Ugh! I feel ridiculous. I know the answer. How can I forget this? Sorry for bothering y'all. I'm just trying to vent and figure it all out.
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