Depression Support Group

Depression is a real and debilitating condition that is often misunderstood by family and friends. Its meaning can range from a prolonged period of sadness to an actual mental illness with specific symptoms. Find and share experiences with others who are going through the same struggles.

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ADVICE PLEASE

rubyblue
rubyblue
I'd appreciate your feedback on an issue I'm having with my neighbour....

I haven't known her long, and as she is quite narcassistic, she thinks the world revoles around her and her problems. I have been able to offer my support to her a lot recently. Now though, she can't see that I need her support too. Instead of talking to and supporting me, she is letting others know that I need support, and giving the impression she is being very supportive. Its like she needs others to think she is being helpful, but she's not, and its all about her feeling good about herself for being seen by others as a 'caring' person. I've tried talking about this with her, but she just doesn't see where I am coming from, and automatically thinks I am criticising her. It feels like a no win situation, but as she lives next door to me, we are going to have to get along somehow...

Any advice on what I can do?
deleted_user
deleted_user
I would advise you not to go to her for help, find someone who cares about you not about their image.
deleted_user
deleted_user
acceptance....sometimes ya just have to accept that people are where they are, and we can't change them, you have told her how you felt, maybe you just have to accept that she will not be what you need her to be
deleted_user
deleted_user
I agree with sam. You need a friend and not someone who worries how they appear to others. Find someone you can rely on and just let your neighbor believe that all is well in the world. Afterall, like you said, she does live next door.
deleted_user
deleted_user
I don't say it like it's easy to do, it just releases a lot of conflict within yourself once it's done, and aggravation with her
ChiTownBear
ChiTownBear
Yeh I would have to agree with Sam. Some people just cant be there for others regardless of how much you are there for them. Since you know she wont support you, or that this is her support, you can at least know not to try anymore and frustrate yourself. Just go to those you can get the support you need.
deleted_user
deleted_user
Sam and hiareth have said it all! Sounds like your neighbor is about as wonderful as mine! Good Luck!!
rubyblue
rubyblue
Thanks for that. I'll not get too involved with her as much now, and when she comes for support, I'll kindly tell her to F*&k off............ Only joking, confrontation is not my style.

Thanks again for the advice, it helps me put it in context
deleted_user
deleted_user
Just be nice and don't expect anything more of her. And maybe plant a hedge between yards.
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