So today I had a bit of a meltdown/panic attack in the car with my dad coming home from my regular doctor check up. It got to the point where I started to cry, to shake, my breathing got short and heart beat got fast and I got that sick/nervous feeling in my stomach and throat...I also became shakey and my hands sort of went numb for awhile after.He started lecturing me about stuff for college and that I have to be more responsible. I could not handle the way in which he was talking to me...or yelling at me I should say. For some reason my dad can't comprehend that when he speaks to me about something he wants me to do or w/e he raises his voice and it really makes my anxiety level high...What frustrated me the most is that I kept telling him to please lower his tone and speak to me like a normal person because when he gets like that it makes my anxiety extremely high, makes it hard for me to listen to him and concentrate on the conversation, and also makes me feel bad. It's hard enough for me to try to speak out about my emotions to my family, but what's worse is that he did not listen to me...and continued to yell at me. Then he "gave up" and said fine I will not help you with school and you'll have to do everything on your own now. The thing is, yes I am 19 and part of my problem is my social anxiety...I find it difficult to sometimes take care of things I need to do such as calling for appointments or speaking to people on the phone...therefore most times I avoid doing it...forcing my parents to have to either do it for me or help me. I know this isn't a good thing and I want to get to the point where I can do things like this for myself. I just wish my dad would be more understanding with me and just calm down and try to listen to me for a change....or else I'm just gonna end up hurting myself and being back in the hospital again
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