ok, tonight i had a date and we had fun... i came in and now i am probably headed for another disaster. Why not???? when have i ever picked a person of worth??? if they are attracted to me and me to them , then it must be a head on collision. when will it happen again to me???? can i make it the next time.???..... well, there will never be a next time, for they will always be at arms length, never close to my heart. this is how it is with me. i can't help it!!! God help me to never let another person invade me to the point of wanting to die..... literally almost to the edge of death... how horrible that anyone on this earth must feel this betrayed.......how can there be a person so evil that they can hurt you to the point that death looks good.???..... well it can't beat me.. i am strong... i am.. i have felt weak and now i feel strong........ i see myself as a survivor and not defeated. who knows what will happen.. never did the right thing in my life!!!!!!!!!!!! sometimes people get smart!!!!!
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