Today would've been a day like meany until I realized the date... May 8..... nine years ago, my grandparents celebrated their 61st wedding aniversary.... two days latter, on Mothers Day, my Grandpa passed away... so sudenly... he got sick, he went into surgery... he was gone... The reason why it gets to me, I NEVER got the chance to say goodbye... And I wasn't told until the day after he passed.... I honestly belive that his death was the breaking point for me... still to this day I tear up... it still hurts for so many reasons... My family doesn't understand why I'm stil grieving after all these years... Well, I let him down, I wasn't there with him.... ok it's kind of irrational, because even if they would've told me when he got sick, I would've never made it back to Mexico... but still, in my mind I have this picture of him in his bed, with my mom and grandma by his side.... and an empty outline of were I should have been... I miss him so much... he was my Lolo... I can't explain... he and I had a conection he didn't have with any other of the grandkids... If I only would've had the chance to say goodbye... I love him so much... miss him like crazy....
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