most my life has been a lie. i hate myself for this. i protect the one who hurts me. i will go back once again and lie to protect him for his sin.and once again il get angry i done that and hate myself over and over. so fucking ANGRY that i wont make myself get over the fear and do what i should to get free. why cant be brave and strong? why do i have a need to please others so much. why why why i fucking hate myself it hurts emotionaly and when i get back away from my family im going to make myself hurt physicaly with self harm. i dont care now.
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