I know a lot of people say this "I just want to die". But I'm thinking how how I'm going to 'casually' kill myself by accident everyday for the past week or so. I have seen my psychaitrist and he's already upped my dosages. I have a therapist too. I do weird things like taking a lot of benadryl during the day and combining it with some other prescription med or over the counter meds. I know you're all going to tell me this is dangerous...yes I know. I'm hoping if I continue to do that my body will just shut down, rather then take a bunch and probably end up in a psych ward. I hope this isn't triggering to anyone. I'm actually scared of myself. I'm scared. I really want to die (I hate using the word kill) . I just don't see much out there for me right now. maybe in ten years if I'm not depreed anymore, but at this moment in time there's nothing and I just want to be dead!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Hopefully by the weekend I'll be done with life.
Posts You May Be Interested In
My depression comes out as extreme anger at first. I'm ready to teach anyone who choses to act like an ass to me a lesson in how to really and truly be an ass. I am usually extremely patient with people, so when that side comes out, well, it's a bit of a shock, and my meanness has such a direct hit as to the other person's issues, that it's almost cruel. then I get depressed. I think the...
So my depression is getting worse I actually hurt myself at work today after my boss told me the I sunk and need to learn want deodernt was, even tho I have told him that i have a clinical thing that makes me sweat more. And i have been having a panic attake all day so bad its hard to breath but im here Im alive I havent taken an entire bottle of pills like i wish so much that i could it would be...