it seems every time i get happy for a while every thing comes crashing down especially at my house with my dad it seems im not what he wanted and weve never really got along and he has left plenty of time and when he does he breaks promises to me and he has even went as far as telling me i have ruined his life and ive struggled with add and ocd most my life my mind never slows down so eventually i started smokeing pot the medicines never work for me but im not the every day special kid who smokes his ass off i have freinds that do butt i have self control but especialy in winter i get really depressed and its that only thing that will work most of the time it clams and relaxes me slows my thinking down and just gives me a break i do drive anddo it or go any where just sit down and think and ive tryed explaining it to my girl freind who is a rape victim but it doesnt do any good i try to be ther for her and understand her but sometimes im just gone in my head i cant stop thoghts from running in my head im kinda controlling i always think she lyeing or cheating i dont trust her when i no i should shes perfect she has beauty brains a great body and the heart of a giant but i wander iff this is cause im deppressed or what this is all i have write back critisim or what it dosnt matter im out peace
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