I'm alone all the time. Even when there's people around me, i'm alone, and wishing i wasn't. I used to take action trying not to be alone, but every time, i was rejected like a freak who wasn't important enough to be in a conversation. I've given up. I can't take it anymore. How am i supposed to get better, if no one will let me in to get help?This is what deppresses me most, my social life. I pick myself the most over how low self esteem i have in this world. I hate myself. i hate them, who said they were my friends, then found someone better and dumped me. I hate those people who would look at me when i smiled. Now all my smiles are fake. I have to live like i'm happy, and i'm dying inside. I want to die. I can't put on the mask anymore and act like i don't care that i'm alone. i do care, but what can i do? so i smile. i don't mean it in the least bit, but i do, and it hurts. Then when i get home, i go right to my room and i cry. I'm alone again.
Posts You May Be Interested In
I miss traveling with my husband. Has anyone found a specific site regarding cruising for widow/widowers or any sightseeing trips. Not interested in being with couples and kids,,,I realize a cruise ship will have a portion size of families and couples, but perhaps they also put together a part of the cruise ship for groups of widows/widowers????
A friend sent this to me..As far as I can see, grief will never truly end.It may become softer overtime, more gentleand some days will feel sharp.But grief will last as long as Love does - ForeverIt's simply the way the absence of your loved onemanifests in your heart. A deep longing accompaniedby the deepest Love some days. The heavy fog mayreturn and the next day, it may recede.Once again, it's...