i never been good at sharing my feelings now my dumb ass is bout to share my life hoping some1 out there can convince me y i should live, im 21 n live most of all my life n pain hurting, my father used to beat me when i was a kid my mother was always leaving or just sit there n watch as i get my face punched n after goin thro dat for 1 years she finaly leaves him then end up dating sum prick dat was n2 lil girls most times he would sneak n my room while im sleep,(u can jus guess da rest) i told my mother wut he was doin she jus beats me n calls me a lier, she knew it was true but wut can u say he was payn da bills for her. on top of dat i have low self a steem i hate how i look n feel i been married once lastd three years then i dated a lota guys n got her everytime im, most time i spend my time n da room cryn cause my heart hurts so bad now im datn this guy we been togther 4 a month n for sum strange way im crazy about him but i dont think he feels da same way, im mean he tells me how beautiful i am n thathe has plans for us n the future, but im freakn out that its jus mind games we got n2 fite lastnite now he wont talk to me n i have a bad feeln hes gona break up wit me n its killn me so bad im tired of always hurtn if we do separate im goin to kill myself n it not jus casue him i jus never wana feel pain ever again so is it wrong to want to die even if im ready
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