My family hates me im just a pawn in thier sick game, like realestate im traded and bargained for and once they do acknowledge me its for my faults. I am over weight just like evryone in my family except my stepmom and they all love critisizing me for not being "good enough" or "normal". I am sick of putting on a fake smile for my friends and others i want to collapse under the emotional wieght. I cant find a single thing worht living for and no one even knows that im hurting. I dont WANT to die because i think someday i can help others or something i dont really know but i dont really see an alternative. i know im stupid and probably just whining but i need help, i really do.
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