Met a girl in high school as friends 3 yrs ago. Got close this past summer. We now are juniors in college and go to different colleges (2 hrs away). We want to be with each other but dont want a long distance relationship. She tells me I am her best friend and I know that is the truth because she doesnt have many people in her life that care as much as I do. I know that. Anyways, we sweet talk each other and want to be together after college. However, she still cares for an ex who recently got a girlfriend and she acts sad and she tells me I dont have to worry about him anymore. She suffers from depression as well and has told me that she has low self esteem/self confidence and hates to be lonely which leads me to believe that she will mess around to feel a sense of care. She has cheated before and regrets it. Due to this I have a low sense of trust with her. I asked her today if she would be mad if I met someone at school and she said no and that she was mainly interested in being with me after graduation (2 yrs from now). So Im under the impression that she thinks it would be alright for her to mess around (Which to my knowledge she hasnt yet)and that it wouldnt hurt me. I am obviously a paranoid, over protective kind of guy. Funny thing is is that since we arent officially dating, why do I feel this way? This is the first girl I have felt this way about. And if its this bad then I dont see myself ever doing good with any other girls! This is my first real close relationship. She tells me Im perfect for her and that everything is going good for us. We both love each other however I think I love her more. Right now I guess we are considered friends with benefits but I just see her as something more. Like I said she wants to be more with me but the whole long distance relationship thing wont work.
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