You guys are great. Just in case I haven't told you how much everyones support means to me, I thought I'd say it again. You guys are great. I have been doing much better recently. I did have a strange sensation last night though. If you've been with me for awhile, you know the situation with my sister. So ever since my Dad has passed, our relationship has just been off somehow. She is in total denial and won't talk about it at all. I on the other hand, want to talk. So what happens is.....for whatever reason, we just don't spend alot of time together anymore. She's busy, I'm busy and that's that. So its been almost 6 months since Dad died. We've seen each other or talked on the phone maybe once a week for short periods. Small talk. We used to talk everyday. Well, yesterday she called an invited us over for game night. I used to have everyone month or so. Not since Dad died. I was so excited, I've invited her over several times and she always has plans (she doesn't like seeing my Dads pictures up in my house)so she told me she couldn't come because of that. Big denial. So, we go over to her house last night and have a blast. My sister and her 2 kids, my Mom and My husband,son and me. As the night goes on, I start to get this pit in my stomach. I'm realizing theres someone missing from game night. I still enjoy myself but the realization and the pit is still there. After the night is over, I get in the truck with my family to go home and I feel totally overwhelmed with emotion. Its late and we get home, everyone goes to bed, I can't sleep. I was wide awake until near 4:00am. The sinking feeling in my chest won't go away, I miss my Dad. I miss my Dad at game night, My Dad physically won't be at anymore family events. It took me almost 6 months and a game night to figure this out. I finally went to bed at 4, woke up this morning and went out to the garden. I worked through it. No alcohol, just a nutty buddy and a hot cup of tea. I love you guys, thats again for all your support. Have a good afternoon, Marge........ My Dad loved game night, his favorite was the card game UNO and a drawing game called Pictionary. He was a wonderful artist in his younger days, so he always enjoyed it.
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