im so done. i cant do this anymore. i mean its been a year and i still cant believe he is gone. i just want him back here with me. u no? i mean i am fucking lost. i have never felt so distraught in my life. i mean i just..... i dnt even no what 2 say. im so just. i hate life. i had a dream last nite about jesus. he was there and we were talkin and i had so many ?s 4 him and as soon as i started 2 ask he was gone. i mean i feel like i cant talk 2 god because im a bad person. and i feel like he will look down on me. that sounds bad i no! im a christian but i mean b4 my daddy died i didnt have the strongest faith, but now ive lost all faith and hope completly. ive been pondering life. y r we here. is this it? i mean like the huge ?S. i dk. please help me!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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