I am not sure that it is a problem, my whole life has seemed to be a problem, this might just be the reason why, I had no clue that I might have been having difficulty trying to be someone I never was. I was never in the closet, because I never knew it; I just never felt sexually attracted to men. I thought I was just afraid because I am sexually confidant with my femininity. Now I think when ever I have been arroused it has always been when I have envisioned women; I just thought it was because only women would know what made them feel good. I do not want to be lonely any more and I would love nervously to meet other people who would support me, yet I have no idea where to start.
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I have been here before, a long long time ago and now I am back.Forgive me for not just saying what I want to say,even under a triple dose of antidepressants it is still raw and seeping and I am hesitant at revealing it as at least under the bandages around my heart I don,t have to look at how raw and wounded.My child was cleaved from my heart by his own actions. my child of ten,turning eleven...
I gave my 2 week notice last Friday 13th. Now to join you fine people in a life of leisure and nothing else to do but to look out for myself....is it just me or does that sound pretty boring? My goal was to live to retire and I guess having to take early retirement because of health reasons wasn't exactly the way I had planned things. I just can't stay in that building that is reeking mildew...