Coming Out Support Group

This community is dedicated to the challenges that gay men and lesbian women face, both between the partners in a relationship and from other influences (family, society, etc.). Find support and talk to others who may be facing the same challenges, and share your experience.

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how do you do it when your reaction is this?

deleted_user
deleted_user
ME:"what's with the attitude mum?"
Mum:" maybe its got something to do with your latest ear ring and your tone
Me:" you're only getting this tone because you're giving it to me
mum: and maybe its got something to do with the love letter from Kath i found in your room. Just be yourself Andrea. None of this nonscence. I dont know who you are anymore, you're not my little girl
Me: What are you talking about? the person standing in front of you is your daughter. THis is me mum, wake up.
Mum: no its not! i dont want you looking like those lesbian dykes that hang around newtown with a thousand piercings in your ear. It's not you and dont try to tell me that it is, i know what is.
Me: OH, my god.
mum: and don't say what kath says, its not you, and it doesn't suit you...You're not kath, you are andrea.
Me: walked off.
10mins later- waterworks.
deleted_user
deleted_user
I am sorry that you had to go through that with your mother-it is hard thing when people, especially loved ones, refuse to accept who you are and even try to convince you you aren't-I hope that she will someday relise this is something that can't be changed
Dante~
deleted_user
deleted_user
THanks so much....i think i would deffinitley be able to deal with it better if it wasnt my own mother *sigh*
deleted_user
deleted_user
Oh, my mom tried that "this isn't my little girl" thing with me too. Now, we are close friends. Mothers have this dream for their daughters, it usually involves marrying male doctors, having 2.5 kids, white picket fence, upstanding member of the church, etc. When that dream is taken, they don't know what to do. It's like their own future has been altered. Give her time to adjust, and hopefully she will learn to accept you as you are. I married my best friend of twelve years (yeah, a girl!) and now, she is my mom's favorite daughter-in-law! I hope this gets better for you, and I'm sorry for the pain you have to go through in the interim. Be strong, and talk to me if you need to!
Lots of love,
Mahadra
deleted_user
deleted_user
I can definitely imagine going throuhg the same thing with my mom. I think she'll eventually come around. Give her time and don't change. you are who you are and its her that has to cocme to terms with it.
deleted_user
deleted_user
atleast ur mum has noticed and knows whats going on. this will give her time to think things through talk to her friendsd about it and all that stuff.... my mum had no clue.. even when i was doing her make up and wearing more make up than she did. mum are a funny breed, u can never predict what they are going to do or say. she already loves you, she just has to learn to love who u are, like mahadra says. ur mum just hates the fact that she'll never see u in that pink dress with roses all over it.

~kabes~
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