Oh my goodness, I am losing it! How am I missing someone that never really understood how I feel and tried to help but hurt me in the next minute. Always trying to put me on a pedistile and then in the next breath knocking me off of it like he never wanted to put me there in the first place. It has been several weeks since I got off of this emotional rollercoaster and am trying to find myself and then bam..I am back to where I started. Confused, lonely, missing the disfunctional relationship but longing for the attention that I was getting. What am I to do? How am I going to get this last bad relationship out of mind and to realize that he was a paranoid Schyzo that could not make anyone happy until his life and head was ok. A heart of gold but a lost soul. What an idiot I am. Why do I feel like this? How am I going to get past this to live my a functionally healthy and normal life?
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