Try to think of something else. You've just got a habitual thinking pattern, that is ALL, don't mistake it for anything else. There are plenty of other things to think about, invent something. Immerse yourself in a new activity, hobby, or travel someplace new. Help out a friend in need or do volunteer work. It's a natural thing for the brain to do so now you have to teach it something new. You're so great to be away from him!

This could be my sisters entry! She ended up have three kids with her man over the course of 15 years. She knew he could no be there for her but she loved him anyway. I asked her all the time what she saw in him and its her own self esteem thinking she didn't deserve anything better. Well, what worked for her is she turned to the church for support and guidance. It still took many years but she eventually feels only pity toward him now. Her kids see what he is really like too and she has never bad mouthed him to the kids although she was honest when asked. For her the churched helped becuase she was surrounded by positive people who kept reinforcing to her that she was worth it to be happy. She told me he was the worst habit to break. She also poured herself into her kids being she has three of them now and no daddy... she has struggled financially as well - eating oatmeal for breakfast lunch and dinner for weekds becuase she didn't have enough money. But she got through it - with support. Like a bad drug, sometimes you need help breaking a bad habit. Take care and good luck!!!

I also think volunteer work and pouring yourself into your children....
for some reason we all do that....think we need to 'help' them, and they do not need 'help' for god sakes they are supposed to be MEN. an occasional bout of stupidity is one thing, but not to where they 'need' someone to take care of them!
I also used to pick the ones that either still lived with their mommy, or didnt have a place and stayed on peoples couches when they had been out of their last relationship for over a year!! (god I can be so dumb--can you say RED FLAG??)
you obviously know that he is not right for you....its just finding the strength to walk away. for that I suggest:
therapy
some good angry girl music ;)
and just look at the face of your sweet little one...he will treat his wife the way you show him that he is supposed to....thats all I needed to leave and stay away!

nursy, I don't think what you are feeling is love. And if it is, that does not mean that love will see you through or that this person is good for you. When we are away of people we can easily forget why we left them to begin with. I think a good thing to do is write down the list of pros and cons of why you think you may want a life with someone that does dope, could potentially give you and STD by being with swingers and does not work? Then work on you, because that is where the answers lay. I think more "self love" is in order here:):)
EllaBlue

You guys are so awesome and have given me a star! Thank you all!

Looks like you've already received quite a few opinions. I see your little angel. He's beautiful. Remember, you are worth being loved and respected in every way.

You already have your answer.. just follow it! Get him out of that little mans life before he turns into his sperm donor!
You have to be a good person to yourself,, and I know you can be! (teaching myself that lesson as well!!!)
Big Hugs!

Change the things that are in your power to change and accept the things you can not change and learn the wisdom to know the difference.

you need to ask yourself why you are trusting someone who from what it sounds like has proven themselves to be untrust worthy. I still have to keep this one in the for front of my mind even after years of CODA recovery.

My best to you.