
Codependency Support Group
Codependency is defined as someone who exhibits too much, and often inappropriate, caring for another person's struggles. A codependent person may try to change, or feel shame about their most private thoughts and feelings if they conflict with the other person's struggles. If you are on a journey towards self-love, this support group is for you. Join us and find others...
I have been called a martyre (sp)on several occasions.. I really do not see myslef doing it,, until I already have!
I agree with Tari, please let me know if you find the solution! LOL
Hugs
i still feel guilty when i have to STUDY! i get crap from my children and parents/family if i have to get a sitter so i can study!!!
it's like "wha? i'm not going to the rainbow room for dancing and champagne".
finally had to let go that there wasn't anyone near me who was going to support me that way.
so, working on letting it go. but it pisses me off.
like i don't have needs or i'm selfish if i do.
and as for when no one else around....we are so used to doing things for others it doesn't dawn on us when we are alone to do things for ourselves....
matter of fact, sometimes i have a hard time thinking of something to do for myself!
i need to get a life!!!
good topic. thanks.
When I'm home ALONE, I catch myself trying not to make too much noise... closing kitchen cabinets quietly, stepping lightly on the hardwood floor, etc.
I don't eat when I'm hungry, I stay awake when I'm tired... Of course it's worse when there are other's around, but doing this stuff when I'm alone is just crazy!
So how about you? Why don't you take care of you even when alone?
one day at a time.
I do a lot of little things like this too - I'll be walking around hungry, but not even think of stopping to eat. Even if I'm not too busy! At nighttime I sleep in a position that is entirely uncomfortable for me because I want to huddle up against my husband. Everyday I walk around with a crik on my right side because of it. Maybe tonight I'll sleep on my belly.I don't take care of dry skin. I don't take the time to put shoes on if I have to run outside for something and it's 40 degrees. I'll do laundry in the basement for hours this way!
I think it has to do with family of origin habits with me too. I learned to go without, do without . . . I learned not to ask.
Good topic.
But then again, he's cuddly, and loves to hug, and has a neck like a giraffe.
I would like to think that I can continue to navigate through life by being kind and giving because those qualities are what the world needs more of, BUT we don't want to have to depend on other people's opinions of us to be the yardstick by which we measure our self-worth.
You touched upon some great questions. YES, I always thought there would be some reward or acknowledgement for the things that I did. Today I am much better but I need to watch my "motives" closely to make sure I am doing things for the appropriate reasons.
Thanks:)
EllaBlue