LMAO !!!
I was just talking to my girlfriend about this last night , I swear to god I JUST did this .
YEP , I was very rebellious as a teen .
I moved out when I was 16 .
I had a crappy home life , well one side of it was wholesome , the other side was dealing with a mother who drank a pot of coffee, took dexitrim , worked 2 jobs, hated her life and took it out on me .
When I cut loose , it wasn't a pretty thing *eeek * .

PS. I am curious ... please enlighten me on your take on how it is coonected ?

You can add me to the rebellion! lol

Ahh, you would find me on the other end of the spectrum here. I wasn't without my typical teenage rebilliousness but I was very subordinate mostly. I lived vicariously through my rebellious friends however I was happy to be 'the good girl'.

i was rebellious but not to authority.
i did drugs, drank, had sex, stole motorcycles for joyrides, shoplifted makeup....
that kinda stuff.
at home i was the good girl (well, i was a punkrock chick).
i remember once my parents went out of town and my gmother was keeping us. i told her i was spending the weekend with a friend so that i would have the house all to myself.
i threw a huge party. a bunch of stuff was stolen, older kids came and wouldn't leave.
i was the talk of highschool.
looking back on all that now i realize that i never could be my authentic self.
i never could let my parents know who i really was. what i really thought, felt.
if i did i was condemned or given some pat shit like "oh, just get over it"
as maia said:
and we wonder how we got here.

and trust me, daily i pray and actively work for a better relationship with my daughters.
xo

I want to add that although I was a good girl, and truly was I was totally boy crazy (not in the sense that I slept around) but from age 13 on, I was sexually active and ALWAYS with boyfriend; and from that age chose boyfriend over the 'girlies'.
Although not 'rebellious' I guess it speaks to something about me and my codependency...
Strangly I'm not a girl 'looking for a daddy figure' either. I have an aswesome father.
Who knows?

Have to admit, I was the "good" one, my sis was the "rebellious" one. My parents did all my thinking for me. Spent one year in college (not my idea) then got married - couldn't wait to get out of the house! The fights between my sis and parents were just too much! Am feeling a bit of that rebelliousness now, tho! lol

I was the black sheep and very rebellious. I come from a military/religious family. What is worse the drill sgt. father that no matter what you did would never get his approval or the mother that told you that you were going to hell everyday. I found refuge with my best friends family. I remember trying so hard to be me but I always felt judged and condemed to hell. Guilty about everything then I got preg. at 17...OMG that was it I had done it...dug my hole straight to the devil's pit! As an adult I still find myself feeling guilty for things I have no need to do. I have a wonderful pastor whom reminds me that God is my only judge and that I am doing the best I can with what tools I have to do them with. I have alot of healing to do, amends to make, and a bright future to look forward too.

I was always the good girl. I was quiet, shy, and always stayed in my place. I was always afraid as a child. But, I always felt that I did not matter.

hazel...i think you are onto the one thing we all share...feeling like we didn't matter.
i think that is the root.
our thoughts, feelings, struggles, accomplishments didn't matter.
i think acting out or being good are just two sides of the same coin.
the coin being "if i just act a certain way i'll get the love/attention i want"
this thinking leading to codependency....
thanks for sharing! everyone!

I was rebellious. In my home, there was an ever-lingering silence filled with shame and guilt coming from both of my parents. Of course when I got old enough to drive, I was never home. I wanted to let them know that I was going to have a good time regardless of their sickness. I didn't know what mental health was, let alone how to express my emotions properly. So I took my "happiness" to a self-destructive level. Now I'm learning that there are activities, hobbies, and other things I like to do - that I can partake in free of criticism. I can actually have fun being myself!

Rebellious here.

Why do you ask?

reply to #2
I think rebellion is a key factor in the creation of sorts personalities which develop into a Codep relationship.
A Codep relationship mirrors the parent child relationship.

"So I took my "happiness" to a self-destructive level. Now I'm learning that there are activities, hobbies, and other things I like to do - that I can partake in free of criticism."

This struck a strange nerve for me...Like I wrote earlier I had a great father; and to be more specific he was very encouraging and supportive and to be honest somewhat lackadasical about quitting something I didn't really want to do...
My mom on the other hand was a hugely critical person; not degrading however and still is to some extent. For example, a grade of 'C' was unacceptable even in subjects she knew me to be working very hard on...and if an 'A' was brought home; that would be followed up with 'why didn't you do this too?', whatever 'this' may have been.
I'd like to say this is what created the 'over-the-top people pleaser' in me and it likely contributed but it did not make me an 'achiever', if you will...
I never not complete something out of need to not be critizied (like I quit college 3.5 years in...you'd think if I was motivated by this I would have finished, right?) OR maybe it is that I don't complete major 'things' because whether or not I do, I will be critizied...?
Hmmm... This is making me think!