Codependency Support Group

Codependency is defined as someone who exhibits too much, and often inappropriate, caring for another person's struggles. A codependent person may try to change, or feel shame about their most private thoughts and feelings if they conflict with the other person's struggles. If you are on a journey towards self-love, this support group is for you. Join us and find others...

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Is it a lifestyle?

deleted_user
deleted_user
I don't even know if I'm codependent, but it feels like it whenever I'm in a relationship I get clingy and feel the need to be around them 24/7, taking care of them or even just to feel happy. I like to feel needed, and if feeling desired adds into it, then that's fine too. But every time I'm in a serious thing with someone, I have a hard time giving them space... like with Steven (just read my posts in the Healthy Relationships group) I smother him so much he gets angry with me, but he sort of understands concidering I did just lose my father to cancer, and he wants to be there as a friend, but he himself is not ready for a committed relationship like I feel ready for... it's so complicated. Am I codependent, or is it just my OCD kicking in with every guy I date? Just wondering...
deleted_user
deleted_user
Hi, I use to get that way. I was codependent. And I had many unmet needs that my father did not fulfill, so I was needy.
deleted_user
deleted_user
I've always felt like I didn't have anybody even though my parents were there for me all my life... maybe it was that need to be away from them (my dad was a stay at home due to a disability) that caused me to feel lonely because I didn't get along with anyone until I was 17 years old. So maybe there is a part of me that is needy when it comes to relationships... a jealousy that my parent's seemed perfect for each other and I'm afraid I'll never have that...
deleted_user
deleted_user
i think we are "needy" when we have a void that needs to be filled. instead of filling it up with love for ourselves, finding ways to enjoy our lives with or without someone, we look outward to be validated.
if he is not ready, he's not ready. so find somethings to do for yourself in the meantime while you sort this out.
continue to live your life. until the people we love are part of the pie, instead of the whole pie, we will always be disappointed. it's also a pretty heavy burden for someone else to carry.
blessings.
deleted_user
deleted_user
Please read my post on " Love Addiction". Perhaps you have not actually healed from the loss of your father and you ar looking to him to feel this void. Is he really your equal partner in every way or do you feel as though you are a child around him? Ask yourself these questions, its very important.
deleted_user
deleted_user
Its a lifestyle, if codependent relating was the style in youthful years. If you felt like you didn't have anybody, it may be that your parents did not relate in a healthier emotionally intimate way. All of the above is true for me. I get obessive and compulsive when I have a lot of feelings and thoughts that are not being expressed, at least to myself. I am in therapy now, and putting the o/c to good use by getting all the psych. work done.
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