
Codependency Support Group
Codependency is defined as someone who exhibits too much, and often inappropriate, caring for another person's struggles. A codependent person may try to change, or feel shame about their most private thoughts and feelings if they conflict with the other person's struggles. If you are on a journey towards self-love, this support group is for you. Join us and find others...

deleted_user
I decided to join this community because the feelings I've been having over my aggravation with my boyfriend and the way we deal with each other earily reminds me of the feelings I've had growing up.
It seems like he may be co-dependent also. God, I hope it's not my fault. He tries to please me in every way, except he does not want to face the issue at hand. His family prefers to pretend that everything is great. They also seem to hide behind humor, distractions, and food.
My boyfriend is mostly uninterested in sex and often emotionally unavailable. I feel deprived. There is more to it than that, but this is what is bothering me most now.
After reading some of these discussions I realize that I have been doing a lot of criticizing. I feel powerless and yearn for understanding and TLC.
I know that all of my problems come from me, and that I am lacking in wisdom. I am aware that many things I just stated contain some obvious issues of mine. I could use some outside input. Bring it on.
It seems like he may be co-dependent also. God, I hope it's not my fault. He tries to please me in every way, except he does not want to face the issue at hand. His family prefers to pretend that everything is great. They also seem to hide behind humor, distractions, and food.
My boyfriend is mostly uninterested in sex and often emotionally unavailable. I feel deprived. There is more to it than that, but this is what is bothering me most now.
After reading some of these discussions I realize that I have been doing a lot of criticizing. I feel powerless and yearn for understanding and TLC.
I know that all of my problems come from me, and that I am lacking in wisdom. I am aware that many things I just stated contain some obvious issues of mine. I could use some outside input. Bring it on.
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hugs always
james
At first I was taking the blame for everyhting that was wrong, and it started wearing me down. I just recently realized that I cannot contol how she acts, and her actions are hers and not mine. If she chooses to act a certain way it is not my fault. If it is because of something I did or said, it still does not mean it is my fault she reacted that way. We all choose how we react to our environment.
As for lacking wisdom, I doubt that. You feel.
That is a start. You feel that you need more TLC, and he is not providing it. It is difficult to get that balance when the other is not available. It takes strength, and conviction to keep on the road to recovery. Do read some of the books in the recommendations section, work on yourself. You will find that as you do that things around you wil change. Some for the better, some for what will seem like the worst. But in the end it should work out.