
Codependency Support Group
Codependency is defined as someone who exhibits too much, and often inappropriate, caring for another person's struggles. A codependent person may try to change, or feel shame about their most private thoughts and feelings if they conflict with the other person's struggles. If you are on a journey towards self-love, this support group is for you. Join us and find others...

deleted_user
y does no one listen to me! I wanted to do so many things whilst growing up, like normal kids, but i didnt have the opporutnity becuase my parents where too controlling and thats what they thought was best. I wanted to join the brownies! i really did.. do u think i still could do that?
i mean i am gona be 30 in Jan! but i probably wud fit in really well. I wanted to go ice skating!! being repressed all my life, having one problem after the other!! life has been a struggle all the time!!! and im this little lost kid!! i want my childhood bak.. and guess wot, i find it easier to talk and get on with kids!! is it cus im still emotionally young!! i dont know#11 but wot do people think.... i have a good friend who is 16 in india... and i so want to be her, i mean her age!! im a child stuck in an adults body!!!
i mean i am gona be 30 in Jan! but i probably wud fit in really well. I wanted to go ice skating!! being repressed all my life, having one problem after the other!! life has been a struggle all the time!!! and im this little lost kid!! i want my childhood bak.. and guess wot, i find it easier to talk and get on with kids!! is it cus im still emotionally young!! i dont know#11 but wot do people think.... i have a good friend who is 16 in india... and i so want to be her, i mean her age!! im a child stuck in an adults body!!!
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Don't wish to be someone else. Just embrace who you are and do the things that maybe you never got to do. You can create your own life/childhood in a very appropriate way.
I love to color and I still do. It reminds me of the wonderful things I did as a kid. I don't think you can join Brownies, but maybe you could get involved in the organization in another way and enjoy in your heart, what that represents:)
EllaBlue
I think playing is important. We need physical and creative release. Just as children are nurtured and grow through play, so will we. I like to play Frisbee sometimes - just picked it up and discovered I liked it.
I think acting our age is also important. It keeps us in reality, and looking forward.
The Serenity Prayer has been very helpful for me. I learned it in Al-anon.
"God grant me the serenity
to accept the things I cannot change;
courage to change the things I can;
and wisdom to know the difference."
When I start thinking everyone else is better, has more fun, more love, more freedom, more opportunity(fill in the blank), I meditate on that for a while, and then I try to remind myself that 1) we create this in our own mind -- what is "more" or "better"; 2) whenever one door closes, another one opens; and 3) trying to be someone else is the key to unhappiness.
For me, "finding" happiness is like chasing my tail; when I chase it, I never catch it. But when I confidently go about my business, it follows me everywhere!
Lately, it has been especially challenging for me, because I just moved "home" after being out-of-state for 15 years. After all that time, I find I STILL get so caught up in what everyone else thinks or wants from me. So much so, that sometimes it's hard to remember what I think or want for myself and who I am.
Continuing this pattern, for me, ALWAYS/ONLY leads to feeling controlled and resentful, but NEVER to happiness.
Funny that.
Learning to set boundaries and pursue my own goals is the only way to truly feel/be "myself"... and to be an adult. (You may note that I didn't say "grown up." I'm not really sure we EVER have to do that, and I hesitate to speak like I know how this "adult" thing works either, as I am currently struggling to learn to be less rigid and more playful in my personal relationships. My conditioning as a result of growing up in an alcoholic family was to be more responsible, work harder, and basically pick up the slack for my single mom which is what took my childhood away a different type of control, I guess. I dont think any of us escape childhood without scars, emotional or otherwise.)
In any event, reconciling our childhood (control and conditioning) with our adulthood (personal responsibility and boundaries) certainly a lifelong challenge. Sometimes it's so frustrating that I have no idea WHAT to do.
Maybe I'll go ice-skating. :)
when our parents control us then we remain stuck in childhood because we do not have the confidence and coping skills to embrace adulthood.
"how to be an adult" is a great read too, that speaks to this issue.
and if you want to do childish activities that is what keeps us young.
acting like a child is not the same as regaining a sense of fun and wonder about the world!
((((((((hugs)))))))))