I don't know if the brownies will let you in past a certain age :), but I see no reason for you not to go ice skating. There are many things I wanted to do as a child too that got squelched. Some of it was controlling mother, some of it was money issues my family had, and some of it was proximity. Now that I am an adult I try to remember what those things were and if I can do them I do. I still have some of the same issues with some of them, i.e. money and proximity, but I will never forget being in the park and sliding on my stomach in the mud while it rained at age 28. It was probably more fun than it would've been at a younger age because no one could punish me for it. So while you can't have your childhood back, there is no reason you can't experience some of the joys you feel you missed out on.

I think it is nice pamela if we can go forth as the adults taht we are BUT with that include things from our past that we did not get to do as in ice-skating. It is okay to seek a favorite doll that we had, and maybe place her on our bed. It is okay to be a kid at any age, let our hair down while again, we go forward and do the things we need to be doing at the age that we are at.

Don't wish to be someone else. Just embrace who you are and do the things that maybe you never got to do. You can create your own life/childhood in a very appropriate way.

I love to color and I still do. It reminds me of the wonderful things I did as a kid. I don't think you can join Brownies, but maybe you could get involved in the organization in another way and enjoy in your heart, what that represents:)
EllaBlue

Do you have kids? Of course we want to be careful not to live too vicariously through our kids, but being involved in the things my kids enjoy has satisfied some of this longing in me. For instance, I never got to play a sport - but my daughter plays softball. I enjoy her games and yelling on the sidelines, taking snacks when it's my turn . . .

I think playing is important. We need physical and creative release. Just as children are nurtured and grow through play, so will we. I like to play Frisbee sometimes - just picked it up and discovered I liked it.

I think acting our age is also important. It keeps us in reality, and looking forward.

Your message touched me so much, that this is my first post. I guess I just felt a strong urge to let you know that you're not alone... and share my own experience. It's odd though, because our experiences are so different. I always secretly wanted a more structured home life. :)

The Serenity Prayer has been very helpful for me. I learned it in Al-anon.

"God grant me the serenity
to accept the things I cannot change;
courage to change the things I can;
and wisdom to know the difference."

When I start thinking everyone else is better, has more fun, more love, more freedom, more opportunity(fill in the blank), I meditate on that for a while, and then I try to remind myself that 1) we create this in our own mind -- what is "more" or "better"; 2) whenever one door closes, another one opens; and 3) trying to be someone else is the key to unhappiness.

For me, "finding" happiness is like chasing my tail; when I chase it, I never catch it. But when I confidently go about my business, it follows me everywhere!

Lately, it has been especially challenging for me, because I just moved "home" after being out-of-state for 15 years. After all that time, I find I STILL get so caught up in what everyone else thinks or wants from me. So much so, that sometimes it's hard to remember what I think or want for myself and who I am.

Continuing this pattern, for me, ALWAYS/ONLY leads to feeling controlled and resentful, but NEVER to happiness.

Funny that.

Learning to set boundaries and pursue my own goals is the only way to truly feel/be "myself"... and to be an adult. (You may note that I didn't say "grown up." I'm not really sure we EVER have to do that, and I hesitate to speak like I know how this "adult" thing works either, as I am currently struggling to learn to be less rigid and more playful in my personal relationships. My conditioning as a result of growing up in an alcoholic family was to be more responsible, work harder, and basically pick up the slack for my single mom which is what took my childhood away a different type of control, I guess. I dont think any of us escape childhood without scars, emotional or otherwise.)

In any event, reconciling our childhood (control and conditioning) with our adulthood (personal responsibility and boundaries) certainly a lifelong challenge. Sometimes it's so frustrating that I have no idea WHAT to do.

Maybe I'll go ice-skating. :)

Pamela while you probably won't be let in as a brownie you might be able to be a "den" mother. I pretty sure they're always looking for them. Have you gone ice skating yet :) !

my family had money problems and there were so many of us kids if one wanted to do something they had to have enough money for all of us to do something which never happened lately i have been thinking about finding things that i enjoy doing, i took my grandson to the park a few days ago and i got on the slide and swings with him, i can't wait for the carnival to come around, i love ferris wheels. my grandson is a great excuse for me to do all the things ii wanted to do as a child.

"healing the child within" is a great book for getting in touch with your inner child.

when our parents control us then we remain stuck in childhood because we do not have the confidence and coping skills to embrace adulthood.
"how to be an adult" is a great read too, that speaks to this issue.

and if you want to do childish activities that is what keeps us young.
acting like a child is not the same as regaining a sense of fun and wonder about the world!
((((((((hugs)))))))))

Hi, Brownies??? Nope, got to start as a daisy first. But I was really involved with the scouts. Cubs. I was a Tiger leader, then Tiger Coordinator, then Wolf leader, then Cub Master and finally Committee Chairman. I did all of these within 2 years. Love it, Loved the boys. I found myself acting just as goofy with them as they with me. We had a blast. Maybe look into your area for Cubs. They start at age 6-7 and (FUNNY :)). And you get to wear a great uniform with all kinds of patches and bling. Kids love it. Good luck, let me know how you're doing.