
Codependency Support Group
Codependency is defined as someone who exhibits too much, and often inappropriate, caring for another person's struggles. A codependent person may try to change, or feel shame about their most private thoughts and feelings if they conflict with the other person's struggles. If you are on a journey towards self-love, this support group is for you. Join us and find others...

deleted_user
Hi there...so i've never posted anything on here before. I think it's been too scary or something for me to do. I'm really going through a hard time right now though, so i thought maybe it's time i deal with some of my codependent issues, and hopefully get some support?
I've been in an on again off again relationship for almost two years. This last time we were together we got engaged, and i thought we were going to make it work. About a month ago he broke it off once again though, and just this week i have found out he is in another relationship. He has a pattern of doing this, and then coming back to me...of course i always take him back. When we met i had never been so happy and felt such love. All i want is to get that back. There's much more to this story, but for now i hope this is enough.
Also one of the reasons i haven't posted on here is that i believe he is bipolar. So i really think a lot of the issues for us stem from that. Now though i am willing to also see that i may have a serious problem. For the past three days i haven't been able to stop crying. Even though we are broken up, and he has treated me with no respect, i still seemed to be holding on to the hope that he would get better and we could work things out. A lot of people in my life think i use his illness as an excuse, and that he is abusive. I am so confused now! I can't stop thinking about him and am pretty much obsessed. When i have hope i can function, but without it, i fall apart. If anyone can relate or has advice i'd appreciate it.
I've been in an on again off again relationship for almost two years. This last time we were together we got engaged, and i thought we were going to make it work. About a month ago he broke it off once again though, and just this week i have found out he is in another relationship. He has a pattern of doing this, and then coming back to me...of course i always take him back. When we met i had never been so happy and felt such love. All i want is to get that back. There's much more to this story, but for now i hope this is enough.
Also one of the reasons i haven't posted on here is that i believe he is bipolar. So i really think a lot of the issues for us stem from that. Now though i am willing to also see that i may have a serious problem. For the past three days i haven't been able to stop crying. Even though we are broken up, and he has treated me with no respect, i still seemed to be holding on to the hope that he would get better and we could work things out. A lot of people in my life think i use his illness as an excuse, and that he is abusive. I am so confused now! I can't stop thinking about him and am pretty much obsessed. When i have hope i can function, but without it, i fall apart. If anyone can relate or has advice i'd appreciate it.
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I can relate to alot of your situation .
My relationship has taken many pauses.... and I just found out this past weekend that during these pauses my ex ( well I shouldn't say that because we are still talking ) has been unfaithful .
I know the pain you are feeling , and the confusion that follows.
I'm sorry you are going thru this ... {{{{HUGS }}}}
Much love and peace
Lori
it's very very difficult to look at ourselves and our past and our issues. its even harder to figure it out.
but, based on my experience, you will never be able to figure him out. and by putting the focus on him you are preventing yourself from getting better.
if someone has an illness or sickness and is not ready and/or willing to get help there really is no reason for you to stay with them.
essentially you enable their behavior.
i recommend "women who love too much"
a book that totally opened my eyes and kicked my fanny so hard that i wanted to begin to recover.
blessings to you. you are not alone.
xo