Codependency Support Group
Codependency is defined as someone who exhibits too much, and often inappropriate, caring for another person's struggles. A codependent person may try to change, or feel shame about their most private thoughts and feelings if they conflict with the other person's struggles. If you are on a journey towards self-love, this support group is for you. Join us and find others...
how can you get stronger in your own physical being without hurting the ones that you love? i dont like to say anything because it just leads to an argument. i have a lot to do in a days time and i just pretty much take it all in stride when some tells me to do something. i am raising my sons little boy. my sons gf is a alcoholic and bi-polar who wont take her meds. she has lived there 14 years now. i take to to detox and she is drinking again as soon as she gets out. i cannot say anything because everyone thinks i am out to cause trouble then. she is also a felon for child abuse of her other child, not my grandchild. so i am terrified when my grandson is over there, but again i do not say anything. i am also raising my mentally handicapped daughter that needs total care. i have a sister that wont talk to me, does not want a relationship with me, i have a 92 year old father in the nursing home with alzheimers with failing health every day. i have another daughter getting her second divorce at 36 and only calls when she needs something or wants money. i look for the blessings in my life every day, but cannot find them. i have not been in the best health so that is not a blessing either. i really need support, i need help. i need someone to help me find a life where i can get up and say, oh my God its good to be alive again today!! the pressures i endure everyday are becoming to much for me. i now have depression and anxiety attacks from all this stress. i want to feel good, be proud of my family and my accomplishments, i dont want to sit here and wait for another crisis that is always just around the corner. sorry this is so long, hope someone reads this and can help me. thank you, judy
-
theatre and I are there already. I'm having a very berry tea with crackers, cheese and cherry tomatoes and she's having a joint with some beer and we're both on really comfy recliners on thick pile carpet. we need some help with the decor if anyone is around??
-
I'm trying to exercise daily. I was doing fairly well until I sprained my ankle 2 weeks ago but now I'm getting back on the horse. Today I walked over a mile with my arm weights that are about 22lbs total. I was out of shape and it was hard on my arms. I also did my 30 situps. I'm also going to drink a lot of water and try to eat healthy. I do tend to have a sweet tooth but I'm cutting...
Maybe you can make a small step by doing something for you, at least weekly, whatever it is that you enjoy - a walk, coffee with a friend, a book group, a swimming class...
Don't allow anything or anyone to get in the way of YOUR TIME WITH YOU FOR YOU...
Maybe you could also begin to say NO, when you answer is no. Who cares if _____ is upset for a day or two - they'll work it out for themselves. If you are the primary and legal care taker for a grandchild/chidren you have every right and responsibility to protect them from what you know to be harmful. Again, who cares who's feelings get hurt - If it is not your intent to be hurtful.
Those are just some initial thoughts...
Keep reading around here, post questions, start a discussion...this is a good start too.
I can relate a lot to you and al anon is helping me learn how to take better care of myself and is teaching me all about bounderies. If you are not in the program I suggest you might start going. You will also find you are not alone.
I`am also glad you are reaching out!
I agree with what RosanneA said. You ARE doing a wonderful job taking care of those around you. But it's not your sole responsibility. You have YOU to take care of also. All this stress you're under will take it's toll eventually-believe me, it will make you sick if something doesn't give soon. Please try to start saying no to those you know only call when they want something, you won't be an enabler anymore and they will have to fend for themselves. People do tend to get angry when someone who never says no finally does. But if they love you like family should they will eventually understand.
Counseling might be another option for you-talking to someone does alot to releive some stress.