I started out the same way, you get your own gram and you clean your house from top to bottom(WOW im so productive) yeah for the
first few times using that much.

Be warned - cocaine tricks your mind in the most devious ways your mind will find a million reasons to rationalize use especially when you put a gram into your system this overwhelming urge to use will lessen with every day that passes.

You are on the BRINK OF AMAZING LIFE CHANGING TRAUMA that will kick you when you are down.

Cocaine causes psycosis and this effect worsens with the more taken and you can as I thought I could not SPIRAL OUT OF CONTROL.

Please do yourself a favor lose your new friends that say you are "cool" with it because
I know that once the moneys gone and the credit limit is reached that nice dealer and your
new buddies will not be there for you later when you cant afford food or shelter.

Terradome is totally right. I started because I wanted to get out of my body or at least feel numb because my ex-boyfriend raped me whenever he could. Then when he finally left me I was stuck with coke addiction. I quit for TWO YEARS and started again because it was there and I couldn't resist. When my fiance and I couldn't come up with coke for the chick we were living with and didn't have money to buy her food and shit we got kicked out. After that we lived in a friends car, we couldn't live in his house. Most of our friends couldn't find us an actual house to live in because well, I'm geussing because we had dope (they didn't do dope), no coke and like no money. We sold dope to buy coke. So we were spending the money faster than we were making it.

Finally we pretty much were crashing an burning and I kid you not God took over. I got pregnant and that was a total kick in my ass to clean up. My fiance went to jail for 6 weeks and now he's working his ass off to make a good life for us and our baby.

So it really will get a hold of you. Right now since you're not exactly addicted ((well you could be)), go to an NA meeting. Seriously chop it's head off now before it eats you! I'm not joking hun save yourself NOW.

well i'll add my 2 cents and if you're still not convinced, i'll tell you the stories about some friends who would tell you themselves but they're either dead or in jail.
i started out just like you. and then i was getting bigger bags to "do the next day" or whatever. didn't take me long to find out that you can have a gram, or you can have an 8-ball, you won't go to sleep until it's gone. i've been up for days doing this shit. i lost my job, my friends, i can't smell anything anymore (imagine eating and tasting no flavor because you permanently fucked up your nose) and i could go on... at the rate i was going, i'm sure i would have been dead within a few months. this coming from someone who swore never do snort anything up her nose... and when did i start? right when my baby brother got back from 2 years in rehab. he started with coke, he was smoking meth, doin acid, shrooms, e, all consistently.

it isn't worth it. you'll lose friends, family, health, be living on the street, and most likely, like me, be $10,000 in debt by the time you hit rock bottom. do no start, there is no such thing as just doin' it a little. it will take over your life.

Sweetie,
All these people are so right, go to a meeting get some Different friends, these friends u have now are not friends they will use u tell u have nothing then kick u when ur down. i have been clean for almost 3 years almost lost everything, my kids, my wonderful husband, and my freedom, i had used for 10 years and with the grace of god and my husband and after the 3rd round of treatment got clean. i was so bad i would have hallucanations during the day and even called the cops on myself cause i was seeing dead people, drugs no matter what kind are no way to go. i lost a little sister who was only 21 years old who commited suicide cause she just couldnt take it anymore meth had a toll on her and i blame myself everyday cause i should have been there for her instead of using with her.PLEASE get some help and a diff lifestyle.....hope this helps

I don't use but my husband does. He's ruined our lives. I've had my cars given to dealers while my kids and I had to ride the bus or cancel doctor's appointments. We have 2 tv's that are so old they are not cable ready. Every time I buy something new we have to hide it. My 3 year old knew that she had to hide her nintendo fomr her dad. I've also had to deal with the police on 2 occasions because the cars he gave out were in my name.
Crack and cocaine just ruin everybodys life.
Please get help before you get in too deep. Best wishes.

You need to let it go.I was the same way about ten years ago.I kept saying that I was only going to use this much and never really realized that it was years later that I was still using to get energy to do something and in reality was doing nothing but getting deeper involved in something that I loved so much.I never looked at how this drug was going to do me. I didn't know that something that my body loved so much would robbed me of everything that I had.The first thing to go was my mind.Insanity showed up.This is that part of your brain that tells you that your only going to keep using a gram to clean your house up.Before you know it you'll be using a gram to do everything.This drug is very sneaky.It attacks your mine and it will kill you.I spent many years in and out of the hospital thinking that something was wrong with my mine when I didn't realize that cocaine had me thinking that I was only going to use this much when I got threw I had smoked up everything and now I was ready to kill myself because I had told myself that I had it under control.I went threw this for many years until I realized that anything that was this good was going to kill me.I got sick in January and almost died I promised God that I would never get high again.My mine told me that I was only going to use one rock to stop thinking about what I was going threw.I listen to my head and got high. The next day I got so sick my blood level dropped I was a code blue when I got to the hospital I was almost dead it was so scary I knew that I was going to die.Stop listening to your mind because that stuff will kill you.Do you want your cause of death to be from using drugs is this how you want your family to find you.Don't be fooled that you'll only be using for a little while cause my little while turned into many years.I pray that you stop playing around with the killer It will win.I send my love and hope this really help you make a choice of what kind of energy you want cause this one is a killer take it from me.

Alright, here's my story. I did it for the first time in April. Wasn't too good. Got it out of my system for awhile. In May I found this guy that sold and happened to get some loan money in. My boyfriend and I went through and eight in a night. He made me come down and sleep, but when he left, I got on the phone and got more. Then after that was gone, I got more, then when that was gone I got more. Then I had no more money. So I looked at my bookshelf and my DVDs and some other things, decided to sell them. Okay, so now I have some money and now my parents are giving me some grocery money and I've got a couple of friends who are looking for a hook-up. I end up buying more and more because I'm getting more bang for my buck if I buy in bulk. I never bought less than a 50 sack. This went on for about a month and a half. Scraping money together, realizing that I could get $50 cash back at walmart on a check. Anyways, my friend says he needs to quit and that we can't hang out so much because I'm going to end up in too deep. So I decide to quit. I've been sober for a week. Just stop. Its not worth it at all. I'm so serious. Find something else for your time and money.

Just tell those people you aren't cool with it and nobody will bring it around you. That's what you need to do. If you separate yourself from the people that want to do it, you'll find it a lot easier to resist.

Addiction happens fast. Hitting rock bottom happens FAST. As soon as you think you need to quit, that's when you most likely should quit. It's dirty, it's a dirty drug.

i may not have the rite ansa for u bu im goin thru he same thing if u ever wna chat im hear

you know, just the other day me and a friend got a half ball.......we did the whole thing in less than 24 hours. And even went back after for another half gram, so we spent about $160 in about 34 hours, reason number one right there. When i think of how it was about six months ago, a half gram did the both of us good for one whole night and then we wouldnt do any for a couple weeks, this being reason number two! Its so easy to get caught up! Here im on plenty of meds for depression, Bipolar, anxiety and i continue to do the blow, along with other drugs. you get sucked in and before you know it your a coke head feining for one more rail after a 34 hour binge. And what for? I dont know lol see my point? dont get me wrong i love it and love the high but i dunno when i even lost control, i just realized it outta the blue one day, holy shit im feining! hope thats helped, good luck

I have been a coke addict for 18 years. Did my first line when I was 17. I have lost houses, cars, friends, my soul. IT IS NOT WORTH IT. You still have your sanity. You know its wrong. You got on this website, put up a post, and asked for help. THAT IS HALF THE BATTLE. These so called friends, they are not in any way, shape, or form your friend. They are out for themselves. Just like Terradome said, they wont be there when you are tired, hungry and cold. Walk away, no RUN, RUN AS FAST AND AS HARD AS YOU CAN. Go to a meeting, get a sponsor, and talk. Talk about everything in your life. Alcohol and drug addiction are just symptoms of what is really going on with you. I spent 18 months in rehab and I have been 4 years clean. Think about everything in your life, what you want, your goals, your dreams, and remember the next time you do a line (I will pray that you dont), there goes all your hopes and dreams. POOF!!! All for a bag of coke.

at my worst i was 500 pounds worth in one weekend. it may seem like a lot to you now but beleive this drug gets the better of everyone in one way or another and ends up destroying your life!!!! that may sound harsh but its the truth. i and many others have lost so much to this drug not just money but friends, careers, lives, family, self respect and much more. i have been surrounded by this drug most of my adult life and either i have lost or seen other people loose all these things and much much more. you have too much at stake please please think long and hard before letting this drug into your life.

if you knew my girlfriend and the pain it caused from lying,stealing abuse and everthing i wont even mention. you would have your answer.other people who think your cool are probably already addicted so your just anouther victom.when they move on where will you be? trust me,dont do it anymore because the more you do the worst it gets addictive.

because one day it is just doing a gram to yourself and cleaning your house. next it's doing a ball by yourself and cleaning your neighborhood.

How I helped myself get out of it was by thinking of my AWFUL AWFUL fall outs. i went DAYS without sleeping. and each day you feel worse. You know what? the last time I did it, probably about two months ago...it was pure and I don't know if it was the nasty drips or I was sick, but my little two day binge had me puking my guts out. then two months later I found out I was pregnant. I lost those two babies. and it has taken loosing them for me to finally knock it the fuck off.

coke ruined my family. my mom cooks it, my dad's an ex HARD addict.
All the little things just add up and finally you're like..."what the hell am I doing?" and you look at yourself and decide something and stick by it.
talking about this is making me fiend hardcore so i'm going.

I hope you are doing well. I hope you have listened to those who have had the experience and have taken the time to tell you that the drugs will win. In the end, the drugs ALWAYS win. There is no battle. You can give it all you've got but in the end, you end up either, in jail, in rehab, in a psych ward or dead. There are NO other options. The spiral of drug addiction occurs rapidly. It occurs before you even realize it. Many people don't realize that their drug use is a problem until it is too late. That is the sneakiness of the disease of addiction. Go ahead and have your mind give you 'good' excuses or justifications to use drugs. It never, ever, ever, ever, EVER turns out pretty. Never, ever, ever, ever, EVER a happy ending with drug addiction. Unless you stop. Get some help. Talk to people who know about addiction and about drug use. Go to NA meetings. Read the NA literature. Educate yourself on drug addiction. Educate yourself on cocaine use and what it does to your brain, body, and soul. It totally destroys all aspects of your being. There is NO way around it. Trust me. Again, I hope you listened to the addicts who replied to your issue! Take care.