Hi I am Billie a Recovery Cocaine Addict. 7 years and 4 months Clean. I was using for 10 years off and on. Done 3 recovery programs and completed and still went back out. The longest I could have stayed stop was 18 months no longer. In the process I lost my first child to adoption Ok then had 2 more children lost them to adoption as well but those two my mom got you would think that would had made me stop but nope Crack is so powerful people just dont know you just cant do it alone. Well Back to what I was saying after the 3 so far and had two more children And was able to quit enough time to bring one child home from the hospital the others got tooken straight from the hospital then had another other child remember I did program that last 12 month live out and live in and did completed them all. Well in 1998 I lost the last two children and my mom couldnt get them.I lost them before but got them back twice they were not going for it again. With my last child I got my Tubes cut burned. So lost those to adopted as well. They talk about a wake up call the was it. It took me losing all my children to this diease. People would ask why quit now you lost it all they just dont understand today I dont think that way one day I hope to have my children together and want to be clean and be able to be in my grandchildren life. What heip me wasnt NA or program it was working 24/7 and the help of my husband.I moved to another state. Durring all that drama with my last 2 kids I met my husband and he took me off the street and was there to support me in the lost of my children and my recovery he took a lot of BS from me but he said I was worth it. Drug are here too but today I choice not to use. So you will fails many time to get recovery put you got to keep getting up and try again until you stay stop my problem wasnt stoping it was staying stop. Its can be done and we got to stop using accuse to use. Sorry this was long but so is my life. If you would like to talk email and I be happy to share my experiences.
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