1. Why did the ketchup blush?
He saw the salad dressing.
2. What did the elephant ask the naked man?
How do you breathe out of that thing?
3. How do you make your husband scream during sex?
Call him and let him hear it.
4. Why does the mermaid wear seashells?
She outgrew her b-shells!
5. What does one boob say to the other boob?
If we don’t get support, people will think we’re nuts.
6. What’s the difference between a G-spot and a golf ball?
A man will actually search for a golf ball.
7. What did Cinderella do when she arrived at the ball?
8. How do you spot a blind man on a nude beach?
It’s not hard.
9. What’s a 6.9?
Another great thing screwed up by a period.
10. How did you quit smoking?
I decided to smoke only after sex.
11. What do you call a useless piece of skin on a penis?
12. Do you want to hear a joke about my vagina?
Nevermind. You’ll never get it!
13. What did the banana say to the vibrator?
Why are you shaking? She’s going to eat me!
14. Having sex in an elevator is wrong.
On so many levels.
15. Why is masturbation just like procrastination?
It’s all good until you realize you’re only screwing yourself
16. What’s the difference between a tire and 365 used condoms?
Ones a Goodyear. The other is a great yeah
17. What kind of bees make milk?