Dave is browsing in a pet shop and sees a parrot sitting on a little perch. It dosen't have andy feet or legs. "Jeeps," he wonders aloud. "Whatever happened to this parrot?" The parrot says, "I was born this way. I'm a defective parrot." "Sheesh" Dave replies "You actually answered me! Oh Boy! "Of course.I happen to be a highly intelligent bird and thoroughly educated as well". "Oh yeah? Then how do you hang on your perch without any feet?" "This is so embarrassing" the parrot says, "but since you ask,I wrap my weenie around the wooden bar like a little hook. You can't see it because of my feathers." "Wow" says Dave. "You really can understand and speak English,can't you?" "Actually I speak both Spanish and English,I listen to the radio and can converse on almost any topic. You really ought to buy me as I'd be a great companion. Dave looks at the price tag of $2000 and knew he couldn't afford that,but the parrot said "I'm defective,no one wants me,so offer $20." Dave did and was delighted to walk out with the parrot. Weeks go by. The parrot is sensational. He has a great sense of humour,he's interesting,insightful and a great pal. Dave comes home from work one night and the parrot whispers in his ear "I don't know if I should tell you this,it's about your wife and the postman." "What the heck are you talking about?" demands Dave. "When the postman delivered the mail today,your wife greeted him at the door in her best sexy nightie." "WHAT"??? Dave asks. "Then what happened?" "Well,then the postman came right into the house,lifted up her nightie and began petting her all over,"reported the parrot. "NO!" Dave exclaims. "And she let him?" "Yes. Then he continued taking off her nightie,got down on his knees and began kissing her all over. Dave,the poor frantic guy demands, "Then what happened?" "Dammed if I know. I got a hard on and fell off my perch!"