I went to see a new pain doctor today and I was completely honest with him about everything. I lost a doctor who was prescribing me a lot of medication for pain and saw a new doctor who said she is not allowed to treat chronic pain patients. She referred me to a pain doctor. I have been waiting and waiting to see this guy. While I was waiting I had to start going to a methadone clinic just to be able to function. So I saw the pain doctor today and he referred me back to the doctor who won't treat me. I told him the situation with her and he said he would refer me to an oncologist (sp?) I think that's right. So here I am waiting again. For what? The new doctor probably won't treat me either. I just don't think I can take much more of this. I seriously can't go on in this much pain. I admit I am addicted to pain medication. But the reason I need it is because I am in pain!!!! Someone on this site very kindly referred me to a good pain doctor but I doubt he would take my insurance. That's another thing. Between the clinic and the doctor visits (oh and my husband lost a lot of work. That's another story) and the fact that I can't work, we are broke. I applied for S.S disability a long time ago but I live in the state of California. Our state has no money right now. We aren't getting our tax refund and I'm sure I won't get disability. I can't handle all of this. I don't see a light at the end of the tunnel right now. It's all dark and I am terrified.
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