I am home alone in my house. I have prepared everything for the return of my wife, who will be home, by God's will, I hope, on Tuesday. I have been praying and meditating, doing deeds of lovingkindness, and studying the Word. I have had not enough sleep, eaten poorly, and maybe even too much on line. The harvest is so great, the need is crying to the heavens. I try to answer that call, but I am aged, bone tired, things are hurting now that did not used to hurt. And I have not because I asked not. I sinned in somehow believing I had some kind of mission to save. And maybe I was permitted by the enemy to have small success so that he could then ensnare me when I was weak and tired from doing it my way. God's way is not for me to stand defiantly alone. I wear the whole armor, but I think it is I who fights. I am in error. God, the Lord,and the Spirit of Truth within me are the warriors. I don't know how to not struggle. I have fought everything and everyone for almost 56 years, and the body I was so reliant upon is weakening. I have not asked for renewal of my faith in a long time. I am asking for your help tonight. I need to lay down for rest; and know I am not forsaking someone in need because I seek the promised rest. Please pray with me: Now I lay me down to sleep; and pray Thee, Lord, A man's arms, a mans heart and soul, take Thou in charge to keep. And lead me softly past the grave, Thy precious blood my soul to save; to break at dawn sleep's gentle hold, and raise me up to sky of Gold. Asked for the sake of He who comes, mighty in batttle, who never lost a soldier, or a soul of His, Jesus, Marshall of the Hosts of Heaven. Yea Verily, Even so, Amen.
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