My 12 year old daughter has been living with her father for nearly 3 months. It was her decision because she hadn't seen her father as he was in the army. We have been divorced for 6 years and do not get along. My daughter seems to side with her father. He can do nothing wrong. She goes home to him after a visit with myself and my other daughter(8) and tells him lies to stay on his side. He ends up using this information in a heated conversation over the phone. I like to talk to my eldest and to know how she is getting on living with her father but i am certain her father has drilled into her not to give information out to me. He has stated to me that she is frightened of getting into trouble by him (not abusive). How can i communicate with her about her life without it coming across that I am prying into private information. She is obviously playing one off against the other and she is getting good results from this. Please help. Its getting out of hand.
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