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Background:
My husband and his ex have joint legal custody of their son and we have full physical custody. We pay 100% of medical costs. The child is on the Autism Spectrum with ADHD co-morbidity. The child's counselor, school, and pediatrician all agree on the diagnosis. The child is 12.
Problem:
We want to try medication for the ADHD. The child's mother does not want the child on medication. At an appointment with the pediatrician this week she refused to agree to any meds.
What can we do? Has anyone else had this problem?
Thanks in advance for any suggestions!!!
My husband and his ex have joint legal custody of their son and we have full physical custody. We pay 100% of medical costs. The child is on the Autism Spectrum with ADHD co-morbidity. The child's counselor, school, and pediatrician all agree on the diagnosis. The child is 12.
Problem:
We want to try medication for the ADHD. The child's mother does not want the child on medication. At an appointment with the pediatrician this week she refused to agree to any meds.
What can we do? Has anyone else had this problem?
Thanks in advance for any suggestions!!!
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Actually, we're leaning toward just having the pediatrician prescribe the meds, document everything, and let her take us to court.
If she has custody some of the time, like visitation every other weekend, then you will need her co-operation. Ask the Doctor what will happen if she does not give the drugs on the days the boy is with her.
From personal experience, admittedly 30 years ago, I'd try the drugs. Plus they've improved immensely.
It is really frustrating to watch my step-son struggle and try to focus on his work. We haven't decided what to do yet. We have an appointment with his counselor this week and we will ask her what she thinks our options are. Maybe we'll wind up in court over this.
It'll be much better to come to some sort of compromise.
If that's impossible then you're left with giving him the meds when he's with you.
I chose to medicate our son without his approval. Thankfully, once he was able to see the change in our son, he changed his thinking.
Does your child have an IEP in place? This is helpful in documenting the childs academic progress (or lack thereof) in relation to his peers, and it also reflects what is/isnt working. In this way you will have additional proof of what you have tried that hasnt worked-considering you have tried the alternatives (behavioral therapy, changing his diet, etc)and nothing has helped, meds would be the logical next step. This would be important evidence building up to the choice to medicate should she take you to court overthrow your right to medicate.
As a sidenote: Although Ritilan is handed out very often in cases like this, it is a very potent drug. The two most common side effects I have witnessed are loss of appetite (leading to some weight loss) and insomnia - neither of which are good for a growing boy.
While we did initially see progress, we did not stay on Ritalin for very long as its benefits were not worth the health problems it was causing. He is now on Strattera.
However, if your son needs the meds then maybe a way to sway her to the other side is by doing some research on the various drugs the Dr. has suggested to see statistically how comon the side effects really are.
Also, maybe since she is against drug therapy ask her to provide you with some alternatives vs western medicine.
Bottom line is with Autism he needs medical attentino and not providing that is in some form neglect.
Oh, my SIL doesn't belive in vacinations because of autism. She was forced to agree to some of them by her son's father because she was just being stubborn and there were alternatives that didn't have the same ingredients.
Good Luck